Page 87 of Whenever You Call

“I’m not. I’m happy to be the person who helps you after you took me in and helped me over the years. You and Bella; you’re my family, and I’ve always looked out for family.” Her brows furrowed for just a moment. “But can I be honest with you? Even though you might not like what I have to say.”

“It’s never stopped you before.”

“True,” she said with a half-smile. “I think you’re scared, Hannah.”

“Scared?”

“Yes, of figuring out the truth and realizing it isn’t as bad as you’re expecting it to be.” Dropping her feet to the floor, she leaned forward in her seat, holding the stem of her glass in both hands. “What if Logan isn’t the bad guy in this scenario?”

“He lied to me, Liv.”

“He kept the full story from you.”

“Same thing.”

She shook her head. “I don’t think it is. What if his intentions were good, but he just went about it the wrong way? There’s no doubt he cared for you. Everything you’ve told me, everything I saw with my own eyes… those weren’t the actions of a man out to manipulate you and get something out of it. I think he got himself into something he never expected to have to get himself out of, and he couldn’t figure out how to untangle the mess he’d made without hurting you.”

I got myself all tangled up. I made a mess of fucking everything. I’m sorry.

His message came back to me, and I searched Liv’s eyes while my brain raced with everything she was saying. Of course, I wanted to believe her—both of them—but I’d been a fool for most of my life and becoming that fool again scared the crap out of me. It wasn’t just me I had to think about anymore.

My daughter mattered the most.

“Haven’t you ever done that before?” she asked. “Made a mess of things that seemed so simple to everyone else. You said so yourself—Logan tried to push you away more than once. He warned you, too.”

“He did,” and I almost let that be the end of it, but then the memory of his face when he told me the truth haunted me, and the pain of his lies sliced through my heart all over again. “You’re right,” I whispered. “He warned me, and I ignored him.”

“Hannah…”

Springing from the patio furniture and rising to my feet, I drained the rest of my wine and pushed my wet hair back before I looked back down at Livia.

“How long am I going to keep doing that, Livia?”

“What do you mean?” She scowled.

“I mean, I’ve ignored every warning in my life so far, and now it’s time to pay attention, don’t you think? To stop being so naïve. To listen when people tell me they’re no good instead of always trying to see the best in them.”

“Hannah, that’s not—”

“I’ve been thinking about taking a trip,” I said, cutting her off before she could talk me down, my voice projecting strength and confidence even though inside, everything shook.

“A trip?”

“Yeah. I need to get out of here—escape LA for a while. This city, the people… everything. It’s not real life, is it? I’m living in Cole’s dream, not my own. I need to remember what’s out there beyond this goddamn house, and I need to put distance between everything that’s happened this year.”

“Where are you going to go?”

“I don’t know. Maybe I could take Bella to Seattle. Show her where I’m from, who I am, and maybe take some time to figure that stuff out for myself.”

“But you hate Seattle.”

“Do I? Or did I hate it because Cole told me to hate it so he could bring me out here without me putting up much of a fight?”

Livia opened her mouth to speak before slowly closing it again and shrugging her shoulders, unable to answer the way she obviously wanted to.

“The truth is, Liv, I’m lost. I don’t have a clue about who I am, or what my thoughts are. I don’t know if my likes and dislikes are truly mine or if they’re just Cole’s thoughts that have bled into me over the years.”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

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