Page 16 of Whenever You Call

Now, though, part of me hoped he’d get called out to another emergency so he couldn’t make it here in time, but then I had to scold myself for wishing that on innocent people just so I didn’t have to sit awkwardly in my own house with a man I’d invited here myself.

My thoughts were all over the place when the doorbell finally rang.

“Please don’t be a serial killer. Please don’t be a serial killer,” I whispered as I made my way to the door, very aware of how ridiculous I sounded, even to myself.

Logan’s face appeared on the security screen next to the door. He scratched at his jaw and shifted from foot to foot, seeming equally, if not more nervous than me.

Put him out of his misery, Hannah. He never asked for this; you did.

I opened the door, and there Logan stood in his navy uniform, his hands now tucked into the pockets of his pants as he looked at me and waited.

“Aren’t you meant to take your uniform off after you finish your shift?” I asked, wishing he’d shown up in more casual clothes because I was a grieving woman, starved of affection, and a handsome man in uniform was the last thing I needed to see.

He shrugged his shoulders. “I was in a rush to leave the station.”

“For me?”

Pulling his hand out of his pocket, he rubbed the back of his hair and cleared his throat. “I figured you’d want to get this over with as quickly as possible.”

He wasn’t wrong, but I couldn’t work out how he’d known that. I reached up to worry the silver chain around my neck between my fingers, realizing what a bad idea this had been. The ghost of my husband no doubt watched over me now, shaking his head and calling me a fool for having thought this could ever have been anything other than stupid.

Logan waited as silence took over again, and it felt like he was studying me, figuring out everything going on in my head.

“You’ve changed your mind,” he eventually said.

“I don’t know,” I answered, tucking my hair behind my ear.

“You know, Hannah, and it’s okay. We can pretend this never happened.”

“Can we?”

“Whatever you want. Your life, your rules.”

“What I want is to feel like my old self again.”

Logan’s weak laughter barely made a sound before he pressed his lips together and toed the pathway beneath his feet. “Yeah, I know how that feels.”

“I’m sorry you do. I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy.”

Something about that made his eyes narrow on me. “Listen, I know privacy is important to you, and I understand that what you’re going through is personal and you don’t know how to ask for help right now, but don’t try to handle all of this alone, either. It’s shit. Everything is shit. You can say that—you should say that and not feel any guilt about it. But if you keep trying to carry all the weight by yourself, you’re gonna break.”

“Sounds like you’re speaking from experience.”

“I’ve seen my fair share of it over the years. Everyone is becoming an island these days, thinking it guards them from noise, discomfort, and pain. But the truth is, it just makes us all lonely, and then we spend our days trying to pretend that the loneliness doesn’t hurt. It’s why the whole world is in agony right now.”

“Including you?”

“I have my moments.”

“What if I have no one around who I trust enough to help me?”

“Maybe it’s time you find someone.”

“Like you?”

“You could do a hell of a lot better than me, but if that’s what you want, sure. I’ve already told you I’d listen when you needed me to.”

“You don’t even know me. Why are you doing this?”

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