Page 149 of Dirty Rock

For the first time in weeks, I saw true happiness staring back at me.

It felt like I’d been holding my breath this entire time and was only now just realising it.

“Making a mess of things is my speciality,” I assured her, raising my hips and poking her arse with my dick.

Jules laughed quietly, and the sight of her future happiness made my chest swell. “I’ve always liked your mess, but this is my favourite.”

“You’re my favourite.”

“You’re mine.”

“Awesome. We’re on the same page. No more tears allowed unless they’re tears that tell me you’re so fucking ecstatic, you’re going to burst unless I let you cry. No more sad eyes unless I croak it in some Hollywood type car crash that makes me a hero when all I’ve ever been is a loser who knows how to play a crowd.”

“Rhett!” she scolded, rolling her eyes.

“I mean it.” I chuckled, brushing a thumb over her cheek. “No more fucking tears.”

“How about in labour?”

“Jesus. I think I’ll be the one crying during that.”

“It’s me who’ll be in agony. What do you have to go through that’ll make you cry?”

“Seeing you in pain and knowing I can’t hurt the person who caused it because I’ll be too busy loving him or her for the entirety of our forever.”

Chapter Fifty-One

Inever knew what I was going to become but becoming what I was for her had been my favourite surprise.

During life on the road, I’d always gone to Jules for her strength.

Knowing that the tables had turned left me more than satisfied.

That void I’d always tried to fill with the band, women, drugs, alcohol, and bad decisions was finally full. My heart didn’t skip a beat every few hours, begging me to go searching for something it needed to find. My mind didn’t hold me prisoner anymore.

Even with news of a baby on the way, I was absent of fear.

Just an incredible desire to finally live.

I was almost twenty-seven when I found out that life isn’t at its best when filled with accolades, screaming fans, and your name in lights. Life is at its best in the quiet of the night when there are no worries or regrets plaguing your mind. When there’s a warm, familiar body holding you tight, and when you know that tomorrow isn’t going to be a test, but a fucking gift.

Except for this day, which definitely was going to be a test.

After staying up all night talking about the situation we’d found ourselves in, I’d urged Julia to be upfront and honest with Sarah. If this scandal came out in the press while Jules let her sister grieve without knowing what was happening, the shit would most definitely hit the fan.

I was no publicist, but even I had a decent amount of common sense tucked away in the vault to draw upon.

I’d taken a walk down the beach. Just me, my thoughts, a packet of cigarettes—a habit Julia had told me I had to quit before the baby came along now, apparently, for fuck’s sake—and the wind in my hair. I sat on the sand, throwing stones into the water, reflecting on how life had already changed, and how much it was about to change even more so.

My thoughts drifted to Ma, and how happy she’d be when I told her a grandbaby was on the way. My baby! And how it had been born from love, not some seedy hook-up with a woman like Candy or JJ Jones. How I’d escaped that kind of disaster in the last three years was anyone’s guess, but a crazy warm feeling suffocated my chest when I began to realise just how goddamn lucky I’d been to love a woman like Julia. One with morals, values, and decency to keep me on the straight and narrow should I begin to drift, rather than someone who would have tied me to the back of a one-legged horse for the next eighteen years and dragged me through the mud.

Somehow, after all the wild nights, pointless highs, and endless women, I’d been blessed with contentment.

A settled rock star.

Who the hell knew a thing like that existed?

I lit a cigarette, pulled my phone out, and stared at the ocean. I needed to speak to someone I could count on to always give it to me straight. Someone who wouldn’t bullshit me about what was to come.

---