Page 94 of Arranged Hearts

“Yes.”

“Oh my God, you’re blushing. So tell me, is he the best you’ve ever had?” He holds up his hands. “And remember, you must tell me whatever I want to know because you owe me.”

* * *

Troy is passedout on my couch, and I’m lying in bed, staring at the last message Joey sent me a few hours ago, which I haven’t been able to reply to. I’m not sure what to say. And I’ve had way too much alcohol, so I will probably say something I shouldn’t.

I want you.

Three simple wordsstare back at me.

So simple yet full of so much power.

I want you too.

Four simple wordsI send back to him.

It’s late, and he’s hopefully asleep, and my drunk brain won’t have to deal with it.

Why the hell did I send that?It’s just us going back and forth. Back and forth.

Is that what a relationship is?I’m used to being told what to do, not having to deal with anything like this. My only healthy relationship—the one with Becca—was short-lived.

My phone starts ringing, and I throw it across the room.

Nope, not answering that.

Getting up to turn it on silent, so it doesn’t wake everyone up, I see Joey’s name flash on the screen. The call drops, and a text comes through straight away.

I want to come over.

I read his text.

Then read it again.

Then decide that can’t happen.

No.

But do I mean it?I don’t even know.

I stare at it. He isn’t writing back immediately, so I pick up my glass of wine and take a drink. Just as I fill my mouth, another message pops up.

But I want dessert.The one between your legs.

I spitmy drink out all over the floor.

We should talk.

That went serious quickly.

About us.

I stare at the messages,unsure about what to say. What else is there to talk about? What else is there to say? I choose not to answer. It’s safer that way, right?

Pacing the floor, I decide to clean my room because that will stop me from gripping that phone and contemplating my reply. I put on light music, careful it’s not too loud, and reorganize my whole closet.

Why?