Page 82 of Broken Like This by Bethany

My mom sniffles. “Oh honey, I love you no matter what you’re going through or what’s going on. Of course, it hurts my heart to see you sad, but my arms are here to hold you and my ears are here to listen always.”

I swallow the lump in my throat and sniff back a few tears. “Thank you, Mom. Now, I have some good news. I spoke to Coach M today, and he offered me a position as their assistant pitching coach.”

“Oh my god! Aaron Richard, I am so proud of you. I’m proud of you for following your heart. I love you.”

“I love you too.” I debate telling her the other thing I did today. My first therapy session—and not the kind for my hand. Before I went to see Coach on Wednesday, I made an even more difficult stop at the campus counseling center. While it was terrifying, I’m glad I did it. The counselor I’m working with seems to be a good match for me. He’s surprisingly young, upbeat without being annoying, and a good listener—though I guess that’s part of the job. He started out by congratulating me for taking small steps to pull me out of the darkness. It’s not that his praise was something Ineeded,but when it feels like all I’ve done is mess up, hearing that affected me more than I thought it would. I’m glad we meshed well since I’ll be seeing him every Friday morning for the foreseeable future.

I opt not to tell my mother, like I didn’t tell anyone else—not even Rae. Not because there’s anything to hide, but because this is something I’m doing for me, and I want to keep it that way. At least for now.

Redirecting the conversation, I say, “I should go. Everyone is here and we’re going to celebrate. Don’t say anything, I don’t think Rae has talked to Kara and Charlie yet, but she got an amazing internship.”

“Well, sounds like an exciting day there. And you sound proud.”

“I am. For me. And for Rae. She’s meant for this.”

“I’m proud of you, Aaron. For a lot of reasons. But mostly that you’re a good man, even if you don’t see it sometimes. You go celebrate and I’ll talk to you later.”

“Thanks, Mom. Bye.”

I hang up and sit on my bed. What a day.

There’s a quick knock, then Joel walks in. I stand up and look at him. “Why are you knocking? It’s your room, too.”

He rolls his eyes. “I was trying to be polite, asshole.”

“What’s up?”

“Just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

Sure, now he cares.

“I’m fine.” I hold up my phone. “Just talking with my mom.” I nod toward the door. “We should get back out there.”

He sighs. “Yeah.” But then his face brightens. “I actually had an idea. Come on.”

I follow him back out to the common room, where everyone is laughing and chatting. Joel quickly draws their attention.

“All right, this is our last weekend off before baseball ramps up and we get busy with the semester. And clearly, we have a lot to celebrate. So I’m thinking… lake house?”

“Fuck yes!” Trevor yells. “Knew it was a good plan coming up here this weekend.”

“Hold up. You guys have a lake house and you live on campus?” Amanda stares at us in disbelief.

“My parents own a lake house, but we aren’t allowed to live there until junior year. We can use it on the weekend, though,” Joel clarifies.

“Only if we order tacos. And pizza.” Rae grins at me, and I shoot her a wink.

Then I look around the room, and for the first time in way too long, my life doesn’t feel like an utter fucking mess.

Chapter eight

Let Go

Rae

Thefrontdoorlockbuzzes before the door swings open and shuts firmly. No one walks through the doorway into the waiting area of Promise Advocacy yet, though. I’d be nervous, but we have a security guard in the back who monitors the cameras and handles unlocking the doors. I’m the only one here besides the guard and one counselor, who is finishing up an online group meeting.

I hear sniffling and without thinking, I launch out of my chair and hurry toward the door at the entryway. Standing in the doorway is a girl close to my age, crying.

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