Page 38 of Falling Like This

I’ve missed this. Missed looking forward to being with my friends, to relaxing and having a good time. It helps that things are back to normal with Aaron and me. Or something like normal. After everything, I’m not sure exactly what normal is for us anymore.

I’m still a little bummed he’s going to homecoming with Caity, but it’s only a dance, right? Of course, I’d rather go with him, but I’m still figuring out how to handle my feelings, what I’m ready for, and what I’m not. Though there’s nothing like knowing he’s going with someone else to light an extra fire in my heart. And under my ass to do something.

“Hey, Rae Rae,” Joel says, setting down a giant package of water bottles. “All good?”

“Yep. I have approximately one hundred different snacks ready to go, and I’ll order the pizza and wings when everyone else gets here.”

He stands back and looks at me, a smile twitching on his lips. “You seem better.”

“I am better. I’ve been better.”

“Yeah,” he says, walking over to me, “but you were still a little closed off until today. I’m guessing since you and Aaron are all good again now.”

“We were always good. But, yes. We’re back to being us.”

“Minus the fact that he’s taking Caity to the dance?”

I squint at him. “Do you know everything?”

He chuckles. “No. He told me. Plus, I could see the drama brewing in your eyes.”

I elbow him in the side. “Ha ha. It’s fine.”Ish.

“Except for the part where you love him.”

I stare at him for a moment. There’s not much point in denying it. “Yeah, I do.”

He chokes on air and stares at me, wide-eyed.

“Why is that such a shock?”

“It’s not a shock. The fact that you’re admitting it is.”

“Really? You’re going to pick on me about it? Last time I talk to you,” I tease.

“Fine.Sorry.”

“So profound.”

He rolls his eyes. “So you aren’t upset at all that he’s going with Caity?”

“Of course I am. I’d rather him go with me. But I’m still figuring all of that shit out. It’s not fair to ask him to cancel on her for a girl who doesn’t know what the hell she wants.”

“You want him.”

“Fine, doesn’t know what she’s going to do about it. Or when. You wanna belabor this?”

He holds up his hands. “No. Just don’t want you guys to… give up.”

“Is there some kind of pool? Do you win a bet if Aaron and I are together by homecoming or something?”

He laughs at that. “No way. You two are way too unpredictable to bet on. God forbid I care about my friends’ happiness.”

“I am bummed. For multiple reasons. I always feel safe with him and a dance and sporting event supporting the football team—”

“Yeah. I kinda figured.”

The guys responsible for what happened at the party all graduated, but I’m still not looking forward to being around the football team all weekend and feeling those reminders.

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