Page 65 of Blank Canvas

“All of this is new for you.” His knuckles graze my cheek. “Hell, it’s practically new for me.” I furrow my brow and a subtle smile pushes up his cheeks. “I may not be a virgin, but my experience is minuscule.” He kisses the tip of my nose. “Is it weird that I kind of love how uncoordinated we’ll be together?”

Out of nowhere, I laugh. And then Devlyn laughs.

“Seriously, Shelly. You have nothing to fear or be embarrassed about with me. Ever.” His finger twirls in my hair. “I love that I get to be your first. Not because your virginity is a trophy or something to conquer. But because it means no one mattered before me. Even with my broken parts and odd view of the world, you chose me over everyone else.”

“Wasn’t really a choice,” I say softly.

“Couldn’t agree more.” He lightly traces a finger along my jaw to my chin, his eyes following the movement. “So if you want to stop, I’ll understand. I won’t be upset. Promise.”

I shake my head. “I don’t want to stop.”

He stares at my lips, hungry. “You’re sure?”

“Yes.”

“Thank God.”

His lips crash on mine, kissing me like a starved man. With deft fingers, he unbuttons my jeans and parts the zipper. Tugs the snug denim at my hips and drags the material down my thighs, my calves, then tosses them on the floor. Crawling up my body, he stops when his eyes land on my panties and I internally berate myself.

I had no expectations of staying the night at Devlyn’s house. Okay, that’s a lie. I assumed we would probably fool around. Maybe grope each other under our clothes. Which is why it never crossed my mind to wear my prettier underwear. The baby-pink lacy thong and matching bra.

Instead, I wore the cotton thong with a hole near the hip and a fading floral print from too many washes. What bra had I even been wearing? The dingy white one.Ugh. Kill me now.I mentally slap my forehead.

I peer down at Devlyn as he hovers a place no one else has been. The longer he remains frozen, the more embarrassment claws at my insides.

Then his eyes track up my body until we connect. A subtle half smile kicks up his lips. “You know, I love these.” I want to roll my eyes, but then he traces his fingertip above the waistband and I forget all thought. “That you didn’tdressfor the occasion.” His finger dips below the elastic and brushes the thin strip of curls. “That I see you how you are naturally and not what you think I want to see.”

His hands land on my hips. Fingers hook beneath the elastic. Slowly, ever so slowly, he peels the cotton down, down, down; eyes locked on mine the entire time.

When my panties join my jeans on the floor, he is back at my center. Breath hot on my skin. Thumbs drawing circles on my hips. Hovering. Waiting. Panting between my spread legs. I don’t dare move. Don’t dare say a word. I simply wait for his next move while reminding myself to breathe.

Devlyn runs the tip of his nose up my center and inhales deeply. Strengthens his grip on my hips. Kneads my flesh with his fingers. Breathes heavily over my mound for one, two, three breaths. Then his mouth meets my lower lips. A gentle, wet kiss. Followed by another. And another. Then his tongue darts out and flattens against my seam as he slowly licks up my center.

“Oh god,” I moan out as I fist the comforter.

He groans at the junction of my thighs then releases my hips from his touch. In a swift move, he sweeps his arms under my legs and rests my thighs on his shoulders. His hands cup my butt and tug me closer. Bringing my center to his mouth. And then his tongue licks up my lips again. Tastes me with unmatched hunger. Flicks at the small bundle of nerves.

I squirm beneath him. Moan without restraint. Curl my fingers in his hair and tug when he hitsthe spotthat has me begging for more. Grind against his mouth without shame as he inserts one finger then another and slowly pumps in and out of my core. Fist the comforter until my knuckles sting as fire and power and ecstasy swirl low in my belly and spill out of me in the form of euphoria.

Blinding light illuminates behind my closed eyes as I float in the heavens. And before my feet hit earth again, the mattress dips as Devlyn crawls up my body. His lips kiss a slow trail up my midline, stray left to suck my aching breast and pert nipple between his lips, followed by the right. Releasing my breast, he kisses and licks along my collarbone. Nips at the length of my shoulder, the curve of my neck, the column of my throat before sucking my earlobe between his teeth.

“Please tell me you’re sure,” he whispers in my ear then rubs his bare length along my center.

When did he remove the last of his clothes?Most likely when I was in a trance, blissed out by what he had done to my body.

“Yes, I’m sure.” I lift my hips and rock against him. I don’t miss the audible shake in his next breath. Or the way his fingers bruise my hip.

“Need to get a condom.” Devlyn shifts his weight off me and reaches for one of the nightstand drawers. He fumbles with the box, still wrapped, and glances back with a wince. “Sorry.”

I giggle under my breath. “The fact that you have to unwrap the box is more than okay.” To some, this would kill the mood. Waiting while their partner fumbles with the cellophane and breaks into the box. But me? I find the action sexy. Yes, Devlyn said he hadn’t been with anyone in years—not that his sexual history changes how I see him—but watching his dexterous fingers maul the box of condoms while he pins his lips between his teeth… I have a front-row seat to his inexperience. A fact that calms my jittery nerves a little more.

“Halle-freaking-lujah,” he mutters as he takes a square from the box. I want to giggle again, but stop myself the moment our eyes connect.

In a microsecond, the seriousness of what is about to happen hits me full force. A fresh wave of anxiety blooms in my chest, kicks my heart into fifth gear, has my lungs begging for oxygen. Everything moves in slow motion as Devlyn tears the wrapper open, removes the condom, fumbles with it slightly then rolls it down his thick length.

Holy shit!

I shouldn’t have looked. Shouldn’t have watched. Shouldn’t have stared at the size of him. Because my anxiety amplifies tenfold. My skin feels tight on my body. A hand wraps around my heart and squeezes, tighter and tighter. And for the life of me, I can’t remember how to breathe. My sight blurs as my ears fill with white noise.

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