Page 3 of Reckless Rebel

I stumble from the sheets, ignoring the spinning of the room and make my way into my ensuite. I pull the vanity drawer open and root around until I find the pill bottle. I toss back two Adderall, followed by some pain killers, and dip down to swallow some water from the tap. I know the pills won’t work that fast, but as soon as I take them, my heart rate settles into a steady rhythm. It’s the same routine everyday, get up, get wasted, go to bed, repeat. What’s the point in doing anything else, we are all just gonna die eventually anyway, right? Some sooner than others.

I raise my eyes to look in the mirror, frowning slightly at what I find there. I look like shit. Nothing like the old me, the one who was fun to be around and always smiling. Even when I had nothing to smile about, I still managed to be the life of the party. Now I am the life of nothing. My soul dead, and my heart lifeless in my chest. It doesn’t matter how hard it beats, it still doesn’t make me feel alive.

I splash some water on my face and run my fingers through my hair to try and tame it. I can’t do anything about my red eyes, so I ignore that and head back into my room to throw on some sweats. I need coffee to try to ease this headache, so I start to make my way through this ridiculously oversized house. We moved in over a month ago and I still can’t get used to the size of it. The fact that Marcus grew up here before he landed himself in foster care is insane to me. Elle had it restored behind his back, wanting to bring some happy memories back into the place and we all moved in. Elle, Marcus, Cassie, Lincoln, and me. Hell even Asher crashes here sometimes, but he’s gotten himself his own place in town to be closer to work.

Work. Such a foreign concept. We all graduated from Hallows High last month, well Elle and my brothers did, pretty sure Elle paid my way to a diploma, because I sure as shit didn’t do it alone. After everything that happened, school was the last thing on my mind. I spent a couple of weeks in bed recovering from a snapped wrist, a few broken ribs and a concussion. After that I pretty much dove into the dark hole I’m in now and haven’t come out since.

I spend most of my nights between The Ring and whatever party I can find. There is always someone willing to have their face pummelled or their body fucked. If only they helped block out my demons completely, instead of just for a little while.

When I finally approach the kitchen I hear my brother’s voice. “Ells, he isn’t ready.”

“We don’t have the luxury of waiting until he is ready anymore, River. He’s spiraling and we need to step in.” Her voice is raised and has that usual tone of command in it, but I can tell she is speaking through gritted teeth at him.

“Baby, not everyone is as strong as you.” He softens in his response, and it should piss me off that he sees me as weak, but it doesn’t. Nothing does.

“People don’t know how strong they can be until they have something worth fighting for.” She has lowered her voice, but considering I am right outside the door now, I still hear her. She still thinks she can save me. I don’t know if that makes her more pathetic, or me.

I push through the door as Lincoln responds, “I’m with Elle on this one.”

All of them startle into silence as I enter, and I watch as Elle plasters a fake smile on her face. It does nothing to conceal her own pain in her eyes, but ten out of ten for effort.

“Morning, Pretty Boy. Coffee?” She asks, picking up the pot, and I nod tentatively at her. I feel too spaced out for whatever shit they were talking about, but the way their stares all bore into me, puts me on edge.

I take the cup she hands me as I look between all of them, “Where’s Cass?” I ask, attempting to make normal conversation, and also trying to find the only little bit of light in my life.

“Zack’s in town, so Arthur and Helen came and picked her up this morning so she can see him. We are having dinner with him later if you want to come?” I hear the pleading in her tone, but she knows as well as I do that I won’t be there, so I don’t bother with a response.

I take a big gulp of the burning black liquid just to give me something to do, as they all continue to stare at me. If they think it will make me speak to them, they are wasting their time. I am more than used to their disapproving eyes and silent shouting by now. I grew up with worse than this shit, so dealing with them is nothing.

“Jace,” Elle starts, and I see her take a deep breath. “There is something I need to tell you.” Her tone causes goosebumps to rise up on my skin. Something bad has happened.

“Who’s dead?” I snap out immediately, tightening my grip around the cup in my hand, and she frowns.

“Nobody is dead,” she confirms, but then I see her slightly flinch, because as we all know, so many people died. She takes another deep breath, and then tips her head at Lincoln.

He leaves the room, returning a minute later with a gray file in his hand, which he passes over to Elle. She nods again in silent thanks as my hands itch for something stronger to drink. She flips the file open until she finds whatever she is looking for and pulls it out. She takes one last look at me, before she slaps something on the counter and slides it across to me. My eyes leave hers as I look down to see whatever she placed there.

Staring back up at me is a picture of a little girl. I’m not sure how old she is, but she can’t be older than seven or eight. She’s beautiful, blonde hair and autumn colored eyes. I know I don’t know her, but I can’t shake the feeling of familiarity. Do I know her?

“Who is she?” I ask, almost dreading to hear the answer. Wondering if we are about to embark on another mission to save this poor, innocent, little girl from a fate worse than death. I couldn’t handle it, not again. Too many people have already lost their lives, I can’t watch someone else go.

“Her name is Sofia Decker.” Lincoln is the one to respond, in that no-nonsense tone of his, and I can tell it’s taking every bit of restraint he has, to not say more than that.

When I don’t say anything, Elle takes over from him. “She was adopted seven years ago by a nice family over in Lockstown.”

I look back at the picture, focusing more closely this time, and a feeling of dread starts to course up my spine as I ask again, “Who is she?”

“Gerry and Ava Decker adopted her after her birth parents died. They have one biological daughter already, and from what I could gather, they had no fertility issues, so I’m not sure why they chose to adopt.” Elle rambles on, in that way she does when she doesn't want to answer a question directly, she begins fidgeting with the file on the counter.

“Who is she?” My jaw is so tight, it feels like it might break as I push the words out, picking up the piece of paper and clutching it.

“Look, Jace, you have to understand. After everything we went through, you weren’t ready.” I see panic in her eyes, and sympathy in her tone. “I know you can handle this, but I need you to not overreact or pull something stupid.”

I stalk round the counter and grab Elle turning her to me, and both Marcus and Lincoln step up and flank her, like they think I might hurt her. Have I really fallen so far?

“Who is she, Elle?” I whisper.

“She’s your sister.”

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