Page 61 of Pain and Possession

"Hell take that chick from your apartment with the kid, Noè paid to send her to rehab. Put funds aside for her and the boy when she completes the program." Water threatens my eyes as my chest constricts. I had no idea he did that…

"He also kills indiscriminately when he deems it necessary. When something stands in his way he has a bizarre way of justifying it. A less cute attribute he picked up from the old man, but nobody is perfect."

I shake my head, blinking rapidly, "You make it sound like a smoking habit."

Now it's his turn to laugh, "This is his world, his family. He means to make you a permanent fixture in it." Before I can open my mouth to ask what the fuck that even entails the doors open again Nona's surprised face slipping in. She looks undone, her long gray hair dripping down her shoulders instead of the tightly wound clipped bun it's usually in. Another handmade looking shawl hung off her shoulders.

"Hey Nona." He mutters ignoring her surprise. I half expect her to be angry, him leading a stranger into her personal space. Airing out the ugly aspects of her family to someone that has no right in here. She doesn't miss a beat when she nestles down on the opposite side of the couch, "I'm not cooking for you. Dinner was hours ago."

"You don't look busy." He deadpans earning him a swat. I smile, trying hard not to feel uncomfortable. Despite the fact that I want to crawl from my skin and slither back down the hall.

"Olive if you're hungry there's fruit plates made up for you and Noè in the fridge. He usually likes to snack before bed."

He does?

"The fuck?" Hock mutters throwing his hands up, "I've been working harder than him."

She leans up slapping him upside the head, I have to fight back a snicker, "Guarda la ta bocca! That mouth, I should feed you soap."

"Noè curses more than me!"

She tugs the shawl tighter on her shoulders, "Noè is my sweet boy. You are not a sweet boy, you're trouble. Since the day we brought you home. Sneaking and alcohol, hiding when it's time for your lessons. Trouble!"

Hock feigns annoyance, but neither of us miss the warm smile in his eyes. The love there is unmistakable, and it's reflected in hers. I can't help the pang of jealousy knowing nobody has ever smiled at me that way, not in a familial sense anyway. Hock stands and I quickly follow hoping to retreat to Noè's room for the rest of my stay.

"Olive stay for a moment." She mutters as she leans forward, pulling a roll of plush twine from a drawer in the dark coffee table along with a pair of knitting needles. I cast Hock a panicked glance, silently pleading for him to bail me out. This entire day has been one continuous mindfuck after another, needless to mention I can't seem to shake the nagging anxiety wondering what Noè is doing, if he'ssafe.He smirks slightly before exiting, I half consider picking up the lamp beside me and chucking it at him as he slips through the doors.

"He'll be fine dear. He's got good men with him and he's strong. Stronger than most." There's something there, something hidden beneath those words. A deeper meaning I'm not clued in on. I won't lie and say her words didn't at least help a bit. That relief quickly evaporates as I realize how plainly my worry must be written on my face. That or she's just ripe with old lady wisdom.

She leans back suddenly looking exhausted, "You know I think he was excited the night the world was supposed to end."

Yeah, me too.

She turns her deep brown eyes on me, "That boy is so desperate for a moment of peace the end of the world sounded like a blessing to him." I don't meet her eyes, too scared she'll pick up things I'm unwilling to give away to her. It sounds like a blessing to me too, or least it did at one point. I swallow down the lump that forms in my throat.

For the first time in… I don't fucking know ever? Life feels more appealing than death.

And it's all because ofhim.Even though I've been a walking ball of anger, anxiety and apprehension since I first met him. I've beenalive.I've faced things I never thought I could because for that moment he made me feel stronger than I was. For a moment I saw myself throughhiseyes.

I never want to go back. Myself from his point of view is so much prettier than mine.

"Olive, I'm not sure what you've been made aware of so excuse me if it sounds like I'm speaking in riddles. In our world more times than not marriage is a means to an end. A way to get something you want, power, an allegiance, wealth."

My cheeks heat, "I have none of that."

She looks up from her knitting, giving me a smirk. "We know. Which makes your relationship or lack there of with him… a point of contention. Noè is driving blind willing to accept anything that comes his way in order to have you."

God, I'm uncomfortable.

"You might not understand just what he's risking. You'll be seen as a point of weakness for him, a vulnerability. Now in normal circumstances that could be dealt with, with minimal pushback. These are not normal circumstances." I pick at my nails, my heart thumping unsteadily in my chest. I'm not sure where the warmth in her eyes went, but I'd like it back.

"He's got a metaphorical gun pointed to the back of his head. He along with the rest of us and he's willing to let us all eat the bullet if that means getting what he wants. So much like his father in that way." Her eyes grow colder, briefly darting to the portrait above the unlit fireplace before they settle on her wrinkled hands. I almost make out the hint of a tremor before she starts to knit again.

"I'm a liability." The statement feels like the first flash in a lightning storm. The warning in a rumble of thunder. "All of this time I suppose it never occurred to me… I just thought-“

"Hearts are strange, cursed things." She interrupts, saving me from taking that leap into a surefire downward spiral. I didn't realize he had anything to lose, not really. I hadn't considered what he was risking.

For me. An ugl-

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