Page 10 of Desire

She blinked in response. Then nothing.

I fidgeted in nervousness. “Did you hear me? I said I have a son.”

“I heard you. I’m processing. Give me a minute.”

I sat back and stared at her. Nothing about her expression gave away what she was thinking. I hated this overwhelming nervousness. I wasn’t that person. I always knew what I wanted, and I went after it. I didn’t hesitate, and I didn’t fucking fidget. A minute passed, then another.

I lost my patience. “Okay, you’re done processing. Say something. Anything.”

“What’s his name?”

“Alex. He’s gorgeous. He looks a little like me, I think. Auburn hair with brown eyes. And tall. He’s thirteen, almost fourteen.” I paused, a small, proud smile on my face as I thought of my son. “I know he likes baseball and football. And video games. He loves video games. His adoptive parents send me pictures and stories about him all the time. At least they did.”

I trailed off, and the smile left my face. I stared off in the distance, the silence between us deafening.

Next to me, Penny cleared her throat. “Where is he now?”

Sadness poured out of me. “That’s the thing. I don’t know. A little over a week ago I received a phone call from a boy saying he thought I was his birth mother and that he needed help. Before the conversation could go any further, I heard noise in the background and then the line went dead. I didn’t know what to do. So, I went to Connor. I told him everything I’m telling you. Two days after the first phone call, the boy called again and said he was Alex and that his adoptive parents were dead. He said he couldn’t talk long because ‘he’ might come back. I have no idea who ‘he’ is, and it’s killing me, because I haven’t heard from him since.”

I had to stop talking for a second, because I felt myself starting to become hysterical. Once my emotions were under control, I continued, “Then this thing happened with Connor, and I told him I didn’t need his help anymore. But now, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know anyone else who could possibly help me. I know you’re probably so pissed at me right now, but I was hoping maybe you could talk to Marcus for me. See if he knows anyone else I could turn to. I’m at a loss as to what to do. I can’t keep sitting back, twiddling my thumbs, waiting. I need to do something.”

Unable to control myself any longer, I burst into tears. The sofa dipped, and suddenly, Penny embraced me, and I cried for everything I had lost. Body-wracking sobs came from deep within me; I wasn’t sure I would ever stop crying. I lost track of time as Penny comforted me. Eventually, my sobs subsided. I released my death grip on her and sat back on the couch. She leaned over and wiped a stray tear from my cheek.

She gave me a sad smile. “Feel any better?”

Actually, I did. “Yes,” I said, with a watery smile. “You don’t hate me do you?”

Penny smacked me on the arm. “Of course not. I’m a little hurt that you didn’t trust me with this information before today, but I could never hate you. I’ll ask Marcus if he knows anyone. But Bridge, honestly, I think Connor is going to be your best option. He’s good at what he does. Personal feelings aside, I think you should reconsider.”

I sighed heavily. “God, you’re in a pain in the ass. Fine, I’ll think about it. But, please, ask Marcus anyway.”

She nodded her agreement. We let the topic go as Penny stayed a little longer and we caught up on some of the latest gossip. Finally, she left and I went to bed, contemplating the limited options I had.

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