Page 2 of Say Yes

2

PHILIP

My mind wentinto overdrive trying to process the last ten minutes. Because there was no way in hell that Casey Santiago just told me she wanted me to have sex with her. At least that’s how my brain interpreted what I’d just heard, and I almost prayed I was wrong. Even as that tiny voice whispered it hoped I was right. She sat there looking determined, nervous, a tad hopeful even, and always beautiful. The sunlight streamed through the living room window, shining brightly on her dark brown hair, emphasizing the natural caramel highlights scattered through it. Adorable freckles dotted her nose, and her azure colored eyes sparkled beneath long lashes.

She’d drastically changed from that sallow-faced, frail, timid young woman I first spied two years ago. She’d been terrified and huddled so tightly against the arm of this same couch as though she wanted to disappear inside it. Back then, she’d been leery of me and any other man within spitting distance. Which, given her history, was completely understandable. Now, her eyes had lost their haunted look, although I knew the demons still visited her at times. Occasionally, I’d catch a fleeting expression of fear, but she always quickly chased it away. She refused to let it control her.

“So, are you ever going to say anything or just keep staring at me in abject horror?” Casey’s voice bordered on irritation.

“I’m trying to compute what you just said. I’m a man, remember; I need a few extra minutes. My brain doesn’t work as fast as yours.”

Casey snorted at that and lightly smacked my thigh. She crossed her arms and tapped her foot. “How long does it usually take for you to decide if you’re going to have sex with a woman or not?”

I choked on my own spit. Shit, I hadn’t been wrong. “Jesus.”

She shrugged. “What? I’m just ripping the Band-Aid off. Trying to make it less painful for both of us, I guess.”

“Yeah, well try not to pull the arm hairs when you rip it off next time, will ya? Although, I pray there isn’t going to be a next time.”

“Stop making jokes, Philip. I’m serious here.”

“I know you are, and that’s what scares the shit out of me.”

This woman was going to be the death of me.

“I’m not that scary.”

“Honey, if you only knew how terrifying you truly are.”

“You’re avoiding the question.” Casey frowned at me.

My breath huffed out. “Do you understand the magnitude of what you’re asking me to do? What you’re asking me is not something I can give you an immediate decision on. There are consequences that need to be considered here.”

Her forehead scrunched in confusion, and her eyes narrowed. “What do you mean…consequences?”

This wasn’t an insult by any means, but God, she was so naive. Almost juvenile in her outlook on life sometimes. I blamed it on her upbringing.

“Have you considered what this could do to our friendship? Sex complicates things. It changes the dynamic between two people. What happens if one of us falls in love with the other, but the other person doesn’t feel the same way? Do you know how devastating that would be?”

She slumped down into her seat, dejection clear on her face. She propped her elbow on the back of the couch and rested her temple on her closed fist, letting out a dramatic sigh.

“Oh, I guess I didn’t really think of that.”

She quickly perked up, a big grin spreading across her face. “What if I promise not to fall in love with you?”

I couldn’t help but smile a little sadly as I reached out to cup her jaw. I rubbed my thumb across her cheek as I asked softly, “What happens if I fall in love with you?”

The atmosphere between us after my open-ended question was fraught with tension and an awkwardness that hadn’t been present in our friendship since the beginning. I didn’t wait for her to respond before I rose from the couch.

“I’m going to head outside and check on things.” I shifted nervously, something I’d never been around her. Patient, compassionate, quiet, yes. But never nervous.

“You know you don’t need to do that anymore.”

“I know I don’t, but it makes me feel better.” With that, I headed outside. I’d just checked the last camera in the backyard when the door opened, and Casey stepped out.

“Everything okay?” I asked in surprise since she’d always stayed inside while I worked.

“I wanted to see what you did out here. After all this time, I still really don’t know. I was also hoping you’d tell me why you still check security for a house that doesn’t need it. None of my father’s former associates care about me.” She sat on the single wooden deck step and propped her chin on her hands.

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