Page 62 of Don't Let Me Go (Don't Let Me 2)

But I couldn’t help myself. I’ve wanted Theo for as long as I can remember. When the opportunity presented itself, I kind of…took it. Admitting it to myself is one thing. But voicing it aloud to Mia is another.

Tongue in cheek, I let out a sigh and finish the rest of my tea. With a soft clink, I set the mug onto the coffee table and shrug at Mia. It’s half-assed and pathetic at best, but I’m too exhausted to explain my logic when we both know there wasn’t any in the first place. Not when it comes to Theo.

“Well…how was it?” she prods. “Are you okay?”

“It was amazing. And I’m fantastic but also like…super sore. Is that a thing?”

She covers her mouth, hiding her amusement before she sobers slightly and nods. “Yeah, Blake. When the guy’s big, and you’ve had a solid roll in the hay, it’s a thing.”

“Damn.” I shift on the cushions, the ache ever present between my thighs.

“How else are you feeling? Like…emotionally?” she prods.

“I’m fine, I guess. I knew what the deal was when I agreed to it. It’s Theo we’re talking about here. He’s the one-and-done king, remember?”

Her gaze fills with pity. “Oh, honey…”

“I think I’m just exhausted from trying to figure out what I’m supposed to do now.”

“Well…did you guys at least talk after?”

“Nope. We most definitely did not. As soon as he took off the condom, I made like a baby and headed out.”

She snorts and rubs her hand over her face. “At least you used protection.”

“I’m not that dense.”

Side-eyeing me, she lets the silence around us speak for her.

“Okay, maybe I am that dense,” I concede. “But you don’t get it. I’ve wanted Theo for forever. The idea of actually having him? Even if it was only for one night?” I shake my head. “I couldn’t help myself.”

“I get it. I would’ve been the same way if the guy I was in love with fell into my lap––even if it was only for one night. The problem is the afterward part.”

“What about it?”

“You left.”

“Yeah.” I scoff. “I was there. I know.”

“Which means you didn’t even give him a chance to ask you out or to make something more out of it.”

“You know we’re talking about Theodore Taylor, right? The guy never makes something more out of his one night stands. It isn’t in his DNA. Besides, I don’t want anything else, either. Why waste my time on a relationship doomed to fail? It isn’t worth the effort, especially when my plate’s already as full as it is. And now that I’m away from him and his stupid pheromones that like to drive me crazy, I think it’s for the best.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s Theo,” I repeat. “He’s my brother’s best friend. Not to mention, he’s been scouted by multiple teams for next year. Honestly, the offers have probably already started rolling in. I know they have been for Colt.” The realization makes me twinge, but I stop myself from rubbing at the ache in my chest. “Theo’s not going to stick around. And he’s not one to be in a relationship period, let alone a long-distance one. Why give my heart to someone when I already know it’ll wind up torn to shreds in the process?”

“Oh, Boo,” she pouts, pulling me into another hug. “I’m afraid it might already be too late.”

And even though I don’t admit it aloud, I have a feeling she might be right. I gave my heart to the bastard a long time ago. Before I knew what love was. Before I knew how easily it could be ruined. Before I understood how much it sucks to have it unrequited, let alone the importance of self-preservation.

Yeah, love’s a bitch.

And so overrated.

“What are you going to do?” she asks.

“Pretend like everything’s great, grand, and wonderful while I die a little inside.”

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