Page 43 of A Lie so Dangerous and Fragile

“Stay. I will be back soon.”

He gave my hand a soft squeeze and left the room.

***

When I woke up, I wore the red shirt and black sweats Tristan had given me. I spent the morning looking for my baby, but no one had seen him. Tristan dragged me home when the sun became too hot. I stayed in the room after taking a bath. I was worried about Kayden; I couldn’t imagine what he was going through right now.

Tears rolled down to the pillow, crossing my nose. My emotions were all over the place. I wanted to scream. My body didn’t feel like mine anymore. Everything felt dark and void. I wanted my baby back. He was my lifeline. Every second without knowing how he was doing felt like a slow death with poison. It was as if someone were plunging a finger through a wound in my heart. If I lost him, then I’d have no reason to live. I wasn’t sure how much longer I could stay strong. I just wanted him back, to feel his soft hands around my neck, hear his sweet giggles, and see him running around while I chased him. He didn’t deserve any of this. He should be happy and have a normal life.

The pain in my head returned, and it felt like waves of electricity were flowing through my brain and taking over my mind. My whimpering turned to heavy sobs, and my heavy sobs turned to screams. There was a knock on the door. I ignored it. I curled into a ball on the bed, crying and screaming.

“Chloe?!” Tristan called, knocking harshly.

He pushed the door open when I didn’t answer.

“Chloe?” He rushed to where I lay, shaking with heavy sobs.

“Hey,” he whispered, climbing onto the bed, but I blocked his voice out and kept crying.

Soon, I felt strong arms around me. I didn’t want his comfort. I wanted the pain. I wanted to scream and cry till I lost my voice. I thrashed against him, trying to fight him off.

“It’s okay. You’re okay. Everything will be okay,” he kept whispering, not letting go.

I stopped and let myself sink into his comfort.

“Deep breaths. Breathe, Chloe.” He stroked my hair as I began to gasp for air.

I fisted his shirt, burying my face in his neck.

“I wish I could take away the pain,” he mumbled.

I sniffled through choking tears, saying, “Do you have the slightest idea of what he might be going through? He is just two. What if the person is starving him or yelling at him? No one is there to hold him. No one is there to—”

Tristan cut me off, reminding me to breathe as I struggled for air. My whole world was crumbling, and the person I hated was the one helping me to hold on, telling me not to let go.

“If you keep crying, then your head won’t stop hurting,” he pleaded. “We’ll find him. He’s okay,” he said softly.

I nodded my head, wanting his words to be true. We lay in silence, occupied with thoughts. The wave of heat radiating from his body and the feel of his arms were enough to assure me I still had a soul. The reassurance from him was my dose of strength. I inhaled his scent as I nuzzled my face into his neck. The feel of his rough stubble on my cheeks and his hand stroking my hair were calming.

“We’ll get him back soon. Kayden will want you alive and healthy. Stay strong for him,” he whispered.

“I’m trying.”

“I hate seeing you like this. You scared me. I flew up the stairs, imagining the worst.”

“I miss him.”

“I know.” His thumb stroked my arm.

“You need to eat something,” he said after a while. “If you want it here, I’ll send Morris to …”

“It’s fine. Let’s go.”

Morris smiled at us as we walked to the dining room. Tristan’s hand held the small of my back, as if he was scared I would fall. The doorbell rang immediately after we took our seats at the dining table.

Morris left to answer the door, and we heard voices from the living room. I recognized the voices as the detectives—Emily and James. Morris returned and told Tristan he had guests. I left with him, curious to know why they were here.

They looked surprised when they saw me but didn’t say anything.

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