Page 69 of Evolve

“What cha’ got there?” I say casually, stepping toward her. Panic settles over her features but it’s less anxious and more mortification. She shakes her head and shrugs at the same time before pulling her lips into her mouth like she can lock the words inside.

My laugh finally breaks free.

“Stop laughing at me! It’s nothing!” she sputters, her eyes wide. “Why did you come in here anyway? Are you guys ready to go already?” she asks, deflecting from whatever has her so embarrassed.

Fuck, here goes.

My smile and laughter quickly evaporate and I sigh, beyond annoyed with the Luna brothers and Nyx for that matter.

“We’re not going are we?” she mutters, suddenly looking crestfallen. I grimace and shake my head.

“No, there was an emergency and all three of them had to run out. They told me to apologize for them and they promise to make it up to you.” Why I’m lying and covering for them, I have no idea. More than likely it’s because she’s currently looking at me like someone just notified her that they ran over her dog and I dislike her being unhappy.

She forces a small smile onto her perfect face and shrugs like she’s unbothered. “It’s okay, I understand,” she says, sounding anything but okay. “Another night in jail I guess. At least I have a lot to keep me busy tonight.” She looks down at the pile of clothing that she’s folding and placing in her dresser, her eyes sad and dejected.

“Actually, I have to go toThe Dento do something on the computers really quickly and I was wondering if you’d like to come with me? We can go for food afterward. Milkshakes, maybe?” I tempt her, hoping she still loves ice cream as much as she used to. Her face quickly brightens and she turns that heart-stopping smile on me, looking so fucking familiar, my knees almost give out.

“Really?” she shrieks, jumping up, hidden object completely forgotten. She bolts toward me, for the second time today, and launches herself into my arms. I barely have a moment to catch her before we collide.

My knee-jerk reaction is to literally toss her ass on the ground. To get as far away from the person touching me as possible, but the moment she’s in my arms, that changes. I lied before when I said her face is as far as the resemblance goes. She may be ten years older than she was when I knew her, but she feels the same.

Her body is different, obviously. She’s taller, curvier, and grown-up, but shefeelsthe same to me. She feels familiar and all of my senses immediately calm. She’s like a fucking Xanax to my central nervous system. She’s a drug, and if I’m not careful, I’m liable to become addicted.

“Fuck! I’m so sorry,” she murmurs, pulling herself from my arms. Unlike earlier, when I justcould notlet go, I release her right away. “I keep doing that and I seriously don’t understand why. I’m not normally a touchy-feely person. In fact, I generally fucking hate it,” she mumbles, more to herself than to me, her face scrunched up in adorable confusion.

And here lies my biggest dilemma ever.

I want to tell her exactly why she feels this way about me. I want to tell her that I feel the exact same things as her. That I normally protest any type of physical connection or touch outside of my playroom, where I am in complete control of it. I want to tell her that she is the only person in the world who knowswhyI am the way that I am.

But I can’t, and it’s slowly killing me.

Instead of opening my mouth and saying something that I can’t, I offer her a smile in what I am hoping is reassurance before murmuring, “It’s really okay.” They are the only words I can force out right now and I know I need to say something because as much as I hate bodily contact, I don’t hatehersand I do not want it to stop.

She grins, her excitement still evident. “Okay, I can be ready in ten minutes. Let me just change really quickly and I’ll meet you downstairs.” I nod, sliding my hands into my pockets and turning to leave, but before I make it to the door, her forgotten, hidden item draws my eyes downward.

My heart thumps loudly and my brows furrow in confusion. Bending down, I pick up the ten-foot length of red jute that sits next to a pile of clothing. It was previously coiled together and sitting on my nightstand this morning. I hear a slight intake of breath behind me and I turn around to see a very red and nervous Ella looking anywhere but at me.

Again, I want to laugh at the cute expression on her face. When she gets nervous, her pale skin reddens like a tomato. It has always been that way. The redness of her skin makes her brown freckles and blue-green eyes pop which only intensifies her beauty.

She looks beautiful all the time, but red and bashful like this? Fucking stunning.

“I uh, well, umm, your door was open and I umm, I’m so sorry, please don’t be mad at me. It was just there, and well, it’s pretty and I was really anxious and I thought that maybe it would help like before when you did the thing in the elevator and so I stole it. Please though, I’m sorry, don’t be ma—”

As much as her rambling only endears her more to me, I can’t let her go on like this, especially when she sayswhyshe took the rope.

“Isabella!” I bark out, using the voice I reserve for my playroom. “Calm!” I demand. She instantly stops her rambling, her head jerks toward me, and her mouth snaps shut. “Breathe,” I instruct, voice the same but softer. She complies beautifully and had this interaction been with one of my submissives, I would reward her nicely, but she isn’t and this isn’t a scene, so I continue. “I am not mad at all, so calm down, please. You said you were having anxiety. Are you still?”

She hesitates, tugging her puffy lower lip between her teeth before shaking her head.

“Are you lying?” I question. Her eyes never leave mine and I see the war happening inside of her. She’s not used to opening up to people and I suspect she’s been handling things on her own for a very long time. Another pang hits my chest. Finally, she nods. “Thank you for being honest. Did you try the rope on yourself?” She nods again. “Did it help?” She shrugs, and this time I believe her.

Tying yourself into any type of bondage is difficult unless you’re experienced, and achieving successful results, especially when having a panic attack is damn near impossible without a partner.

“Are you okay to go out right now? Or do you want to be tied first?” Her anxiety may still be high but she’s not having a panic attack, so I’m guessing she is okay, but I don’t want to assume. Some people are amazing at hiding their emotions. I should know, I am one of them.

“I’m okay,” she mumbles, her voice breathy. I nod and smile before quickly coiling the rope once more and setting it down on her bed.

“You can have that one, but I’m going to teach you how to properly use it before you try again. Get ready and meet me downstairs.” I turn my back and walk out of the room before she has a chance to argue.

---