Page 21 of Fury

I settled into a dark pool and floated on the murky surface.

Floated into the dark.

Iforced myeyes open.

My leather jacket hung on my chair the way I always kept it. “Black Elk”, my used paperback about a Sioux mystic, sat on the same corner of the desk where I’d last left it.

My desk. My bed. My room.

“He’s awake.”

“Finally. It’s been a few days.”

People visited and smiled at me. A shiny vase with a top on it I’d never seen before caught my eyes on the dresser opposite my bed.

“Chaz?” I gestured at the vase with a lift of my chin.

“It’s your old man, Kid. Cremated.” Chaz shrugged, gnawing on his lower lip.

I stared at the vase. It stared at me.

The old ladies ran around applying ice packs, aloe vera, and vitamin E gel on my wounds, making sure I took my meds on time, feeding me soups and stews.

Some young girl I didn’t know set down a paper plate filled with small sandwich squares. “It’s smoked turkey with bacon and Swiss. They told me to make it for you. That it’s your favorite.” She smiled nervously. “I cut it into small pieces so it would be easy for you to handle.” She darted out of my room.

My eyes landed on the sandwich. A dizzying spiral uncoiled in my stomach, looping through my gut, squeezing in my chest.

Sliced white bread. Sliced white bread.

The stench of the cell.

Serena feeding me.

The touch of her hand. A slight smile in the dim light that lit my world.

The cold slime of the concrete under me.

Drip of the hose.

My mouth dried, and I heaved for air. Cold sweat prickled at my hairline.

The vase across the room.

The vase.

Have to get away. Have to make it stop.

I kicked my legs.

The sandwich stared back at me. If I ate it, would she come to me? My Serena? No, no, she wasn’t here and we weren’t together. There wouldn’t be any touching, there would be no—

“Honey, you want me to help you with the sandwich?” Kerry, Chaz’s old lady, stood over me. “Kid, you okay? You don’t look so good. Is the fever back?” She leaned over me her hand moving toward my face.

Not her touch, not hers… “Don’t!” I choked on my breath.

“What is it, baby? What is it?”

My arm wouldn’t obey my command. It wouldn’t lift, wouldn’t point at that fucking white Wonder bread a few inches from me. Block it from my view.

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