Page 215 of Fury

I ripped the sheets off my bed and shoved them in the washing machine, took a shower, downed a greens drink, got dressed, and went to my store. I put everything out of my head and only concentrated on putting the finishing touches on the surprise I’d been making for Tania. I’d planned on giving it to her this week, but after the other night, after shutting her out, yelling at her, would she even speak to me?

I detested confrontations, especially with people I cared about. But emotions and denial made things muddy and ugly. Tania had always been there for me, always pitching in, offering solutions, a don’t-worry-we-got-this hug. And now she was in the middle of my and Finger’s tangle in more ways than one.

I had to make this right.

Once Mimi, my new assistant, showed up for work at the store, I went down the block to the Meager Grand and ordered a super large extra deluxe iced coffee that I knew Tania would enjoy. I headed back up the block to Tania’s art gallery/antiques shop, the Rusted Heart. She’d opened up a couple of months ago, making her long time dream a reality, and right here in her home town.

I pushed open the front door of the Rusted Heart, a bell jangling overhead, and strode to the handmade wood slab front desk where she sat, glaring at her computer screen behind a pair of reading glasses. I set the Meager Grand cup on the desk and her eyes widened, tracking up the large iced coffee with a dollop of whipped cream. Good coffee was serious business.

She removed her glasses. “That looks insanely yummy.”

“That’s cold-brewed.”

“Bless you, my child.” She grabbed the coffee and took a greedy sip from the tall straw, groaning. She gestured to the rattan armchair next to her. “Sit.”

I sat down, my muscles relaxing one by one. “I’m so sorry about the other night at my house.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah. Better. I’m sorry I lost it. You came over because you care, because you were concerned. And I was a mess. I’ve been a burden to you. For years now.”

“No, you haven’t, Lenore.” She eyed me. “Things are complicated. I get that. But maybe you could give an inch.”

I traced over the fresh scab on my arm. “Finger was really angry.”

“Being upset was at the heart of his anger. He’s trying, Lenore. He’s reaching out.”

“He hates me.”

Maybe he didn’t, but he just might one day soon. Hiding behind denial was easier than having to chop its thick vines into little bits and burn the pieces, inhaling its bitter smoke, exposing the naked truth. Not easier, no. I’d just gotten used to it.

Finger hating me had always been a painful idea, but now it was no longer an idea, a “one day maybe” theory, but an imminent reality staring at me in the face with dark eyes that pierced my soul, their molten power melting everything inside me down to its essence. And that essence was us; if I was going to move forward with him, I’d have to be totally honest and fearless in that honesty.

“He doesn’t hate you. He can’t,” Tania said. “I hate all these bad feelings flying between all of us.”

He’d given her a hard time too, and she didn’t deserve any of it. “That’s my fault.”

“I’m not trying to lay blame here.” She put her coffee down and took in a breath. “I’m tired. I was up late last night with my mother.”

“Is she okay?”

Tania explained how her mother hadn’t been dealing very well with her MS this week. Two steps forward, one step back, over and over again.

“I’m so sorry your family’s going through this. I have something that can cheer you up.”

Tania shook the almost empty coffee cup, the ice rattling within. “Vanilla vodka over ice?”

I let out a laugh, and that cramping in the pit of my stomach finally released its evil pinch. “No, no. Too early for that. This is way better. I’ll be right back.”

I went to my store, and placed her gift in a small shopping bag, and went back to her gallery. I handed her the bag, a grin on my face. I knew she wasn’t able to spend much time or money on herself with setting up her business and caring for her mother. She’d had a crush on Butler for a long time and now Butler was free, and her divorce was being finalized. If I could offer her a moment’s pleasure, I damn well would. That I could do. Erase her stress for just a little while. To wipe away the smudges, dirt, and blurriness like efficient windshield wipers.

My grandmother had the right idea. The gift of hand-made pretty was like no other, and that’s why I’d named my business for what she’d given me.

Tania’s eyes widened at the sight of the purple Lenore’s Lace bag. I drew out the piece I’d designed for her.

“Holy—”

“I know.”

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