Page 105 of Rewrite the Rules

It takes a few grazes of his fingertips across the fabric covering my womanhood before I’m lost in a blinding surge of ecstasy. I grip his shoulders, squeezing for dear life. It’s the most intense climax I’ve ever had and we’ve barely started. Even Joel is surprised and no doubt smug based on the way he’s looking down at me.

“Glad you’re not faking it anymore.” Joel watches my bare chest dramatically rise and fall as I gulp for breath. Here I thought my performance in his office was pretty good. I guess not.

“You noticed that?”

“Yes. And I don’t ever want you to fake anything with me. How else will I know how to take care of you?”

He climbs off the bed to remove his pants and I eagerly raise my hips to let him peel off my dampened panties.

“Condoms are in the top left.” I nod over to my nightstand.

“How about just me and you tonight? Nothing in our way.” He’s on top of me, his weight sinking me into the mattress.

I cup his face. “Just us?”

“Is that okay?”

“Yes. More than okay.”

He pushes into me slowly and groans. I feel every muscled groove of his manhood pulsing inside of me. I feel everything. He must too because he lets out a sound that’s a mix between tortured and relieved. His hand that holds him slips for just a minute and I feel his full weight pressing me deeper into the bed. I don’t have time to tell him I love the heaviness, all the pressure—he quickly composes himself and replants his hand by my shoulder.

“Fuck, you feel so good like this. God, Adler.” He pumps into me, delicate but intentional, knowing exactly the pace I like and how to hold me close. He grabs my knee and pushes it upward so he can get deeper. My eyes cross as I feel every inch of his length, every ridge, every twitch. He fills me past capacity but somehow I accommodate. My nails dig into his back.He knows me.Sweat beads on Joel’s forehead and down his chest.He wants me.He moans against my lips.I’m his.It feels so damn good and I am at the top. I clench, my lower back strains, my heart, my walls, everything begins to throb dramatically.

It feels so good. Too good. But I can’t help it. I let myself go…way too far.

“I love you.”

Oh shit.Oh no. Please no.

He stills. I reach into the air as if I could snatch back the words and shove them into the abyss of my mind where they belong. Joel said slow. No pressure. No expectations. And so naturally I respected that…for exactly five minutes and then I told him I love him.

“I’m sorry, I was just—”

“Caught up in the moment?”

To my great relief, Joel is smiling at me. He doesn’t look as freaked out as I was imagining.

“Something like that. You don’t have to say anything back.”

He kisses me sweetly. On the forehead. On my cheek. My lips. “Are you sure? Not faking?” He raises his eyebrows at me.

“I’m sure.”

I waited until I was twenty-five to be with a man, until it felt right. Joel deserves my patience until it feels right for him too. He waited for my body, I’ll wait for his heart. We have ample time to figure things out.

“Tu es incroyable,” he breathes. “Tu es parfaite pour moi.”

“Ooohyeah, keep going,” I say, settling right back into our lusty passion.

“Speaking in French or making love to you?”

“Yes.”

Joel obliges and it’s not long before I’m tensing again. Maybe just from his words. I bridge my hips to meet him and flex as hard as I can.

“Are you—” He pinches his eyes shut, struggling to speak. “Can I—”

“Yes.” I nod. “Inside.”

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