Quick as lightning, she reaches over and yanks the keys out of the ignition. My car groans and dies. “I wasn’t asking, Dima. It’s not safe for him right now. We don’t even know what’s going to happen next. Who is going to come for us. He’s better off with Ernestine while we figure it out.”

I bite back a frustrated grunt and slump into my seat.

I know she’s right—an infant would only complicate things. But that doesn’t make it any harder to watch the van drive away in the rearview mirror.

Then I become aware of Arya’s gentle breathing next to me. I turn to look at her once more.

“So you’re with me then.”

She shrugs. “I guess so.”

“Didn’t think that would be your first choice.”

Arya hesitates for a minute and then shakes her head. “Fun, upbeat guy like you—what’s not to love?”

“Very funny.”

“Nothing’s funny anymore.” She sobers up. “You’re my son’s father, Dima. I can’t hate you. I can’t fear you. Don’t get me wrong—I do hate you a lot of the time and you’re definitely scary. But… that’s no way to live.”

I tilt my head and look at her. I wish I knew how to describe what she meant to me. Is she a thorn in my side? An angel I don’t deserve? I don’t fucking know.

But despite all the dark, fucked-up shit we’ve been through together…

I’m glad she’s here.

I reach across the front seat and gather Arya’s hand inside of mine. Her fingers are cold. I lift them to my mouth and press a delicate kiss into her knuckles. She watches me, her green eyes unreadable in the dark.

Then she blinks and pulls her hand away. “What’s your plan now? What’s next?”

The plan is to fuck you senseless,I say in my head. But I know it’s not the time for that now. It’ll have to wait. My cock is not pleased about it, but oh well. It’ll have to wait, too.

“I think the only plan I have is to go see my brother.”

“Ilyasov?”

I nod. “I fucked up this hit. Bad. I don’t see a way to fix it now that Ennio is dead.”

“Maybe killing the son will be enough for him,” she suggests. “If he just wanted revenge, killing the man’s kid is a surefire way to do it.”

“I doubt Ilyasov will see it that way. Still, I have to go talk to him.”

“He’s your brother. Surely he’ll understand.”

I scoff. “Spoken like someone who doesn’t know my brother.”

Arya lays a hand on my arm again. I barely resist the urge to pull her across the car into my lap. God knows I could use an outlet for some of this tension right about now. But sex would only make things more complicated than they need to be.

“We’ve got a long drive. You sure you want to come?”

In response, Arya reaches up and grabs her seatbelt, strapping it in place. Then she looks at me. “Well, what’re we waiting for?”

She looks… well, maybe not happy. But she doesn’t look like she’s in a waking nightmare.

It’ll have to suffice.

* * *

I point the car towards Chicago and drive for a while. When my eyes start to close, I pull over to sleep at a rest stop for a few hours. Arya curls up like a cat in the back seat, using one of my jackets like a blanket. I lay my seat back as far as it will go and try to stretch my legs out as best as I can.