Page 44 of Corrupted Queen

“I know,” I say sadly. “But remember how good you’ll feel once you’re back to normal.”

She presses her lips together uncertainly. “I don’t know if I will, Alexis. I pushed a guy out a window. Is there really a way for me to feel normal again after that?”

“Yes,” I assure her, thinking back to my own traumatic experience of being kidnapped.

Then again, am I qualified to give that advice? I may not have nightmares about Andrew Walsh anymore, but I spent weeks with my back pressed to a wall and a knife strapped somewhere to me at all times. I probably would still be acting like that if I didn’t feel so safe in Gabriel’s mansion.

I hadn’t given much thought to it before now, but being in the mansion has allowed me to relax in a way I wasn’t able to do at all in the motels that came before.

“I don’t feel like I’ll ever be normal,” she says with a sigh. “I’m so sorry for getting you involved in all this, whateverthiseven is. I should have been more suspicious of Killian from the start. I had no idea about any of this until it was too late.”

A twinge of guilt pricks my ribs. Clara has no idea that it was I who got her involved in this, and not the other way around. Killian would have never targeted her if not for me and my connection to the Italian mob. I want to tell her, but she needs stability right now and that kind of revelation could send her spiraling again.

“Clara, you couldn’t have known,” I say. “Please don’t blame yourself. I’m fine. Totally fine. I love you, and I’m just happy that you’re getting help. Believe me when I say that things will go back to normal.”

She smiles, though it doesn’t reach her eyes. “Thank you, Alexis. That means a lot.”

* * *

Warm. Soft. Cozy.

I stretch, taking a deep breath as I lift from the depths of the sleep I was in until a moment ago. The room is black and quiet, but I already know what woke me.

The mattress sinks down on the other side with Gabriel’s weight, and I roll over to meet him. I feel like I have been asleep for hours, so it must be late. Gabriel has been working late most nights. He will be back at work early in the morning. I wonder how he bears the sleep deprivation.

“Hey,” I say softly, blinking my heavy eyelids.

He shifts and stretches out on the bed, but does not greet me, does not pull me to him. I run my fingers over his bare chest, feeling the swell of his muscles, the heat of his skin.

“What’s wrong?” I murmur.

“Go back to sleep.”

I hold so much anger and resentment toward Gabriel during the day, not to mention confusion. It always melts away by the time he comes to my bed. I wonder if it is the darkness. Perhaps it is easier to see each other with nothing to illuminate the fissures in our relationship.

Either way, the brush-off bothers me. Something is on his mind, and suddenly, soothing him is the most important thing in the world to me.

“Gabriel.” I cuddle up to his side, tipping his face toward mine. “What’s the matter?”

His breath fans across my lips. “It’s nothing. Just go to sleep.”

“No,” I reply. “You’re just going to sit here, stewing in the dark if I do.”

He chuckles humorlessly. “Sometimes I think you know me better than anyone in the world.”

I don’t know why, but that comment makes my chest puff with pride. Perhaps it is because getting beneath Gabriel’s hard-candy shell is what most would consider an impossible task.

I press a kiss to his chest, and he rubs a hand over my back.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” he says, not unkindly. “Go back to sleep.”

I trail my fingers over his tight stomach, tracing the line of his boxers. “Let’s not talk then.”

My hand dips below the waistline and Gabriel’s breath catches. I take my time, tracing the muscular V to the top of his pubic bone, where I stroke his soft curls. Then it’s down further, until I reach the base of his cock, which is already swelling in response to my touch.

Gabriel’s hand tightens on my shoulder and he swears under his breath. I love having this power over him. He’s such a huge, imposing figure, but a few gentle caresses and he becomes putty in my hands. Just like that.

I glide my fingers over his shaft, down to the meaty head of his cock, then back up again. Teasing him. Testing him. Gabriel is always the one in control, but something about the shift in his breathing and the way he lies perfectly still tells me that tonight I get to be the one in charge. The thought excites me.

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