“But he worships the ground you walk on.” Isabella chuckled, speeding up on the main road.

“He kinda does. What I’m trying to say is, I know there is someone out there for you too. If you want that, I mean, which you’ve said you do. So, just . . . don’t settle. You deserve a man who will accept you as you are and love every part. Someone who’s willing to be vulnerable and share their life, scars and all,” Tessa said.

“You’re right. And I won’t settle. It’s just hard because Nash is an amazing man. He doesn’t let a lot of people in to see it, but he has this whole other side to him. He’s kind and caring and so thoughtful. He treats me like I’m . . . like I’m special to him.”

“But then he doesn’t commit to you. He doesn’t open up emotionally,” Tessa argued, a voice of reason.

“Yeah. And his family keeps telling me he seems different with me, like he could care about me, and I want to believe it so much that maybe I’m just seeing things that aren’t really there.”

“Has he led you on to believe he could want more?”

“No. He’s been very clear where we stand with his words. It’s his actions that have me confused.”

“What does your heart tell you?” her friend asked.

“That despite everything, I love him.” Her voice hitched, emotion welling in her throat. “I didn’t mean for it to happen. But it did. And now I’m right back where I started, like I was with Robert.”

“My heart is breaking for you, babe. What does your brain tell you?”

“That this isn’t going to work. That I’m setting myself up for disaster. But I still have this small flicker of hope. Like if I just hold on a little longer and give him space and patience, he can get there.”

“Oh, sweetheart. You shouldn’t have to convince someone to love you. Either they do or they don’t. And if this guy is too scared to be vulnerable with you, he isn’t worth it. Real love isn’t conditional. It’s not based on a perfect set of circumstances. If he can’t love you back today, he doesn’t deserve you tomorrow.”

“I hear you.” It didn’t make her heart any less tangled or her chest ache any less. But the support of her friend meant everything to her.

“I can come and visit. Just say the word and I’ll be on a plane if you need me.”

“I appreciate it, Tessa. I’m just . . . I need to really think this through and make some decisions.”

“I love you.”

“Me too.”

The line cut and Isabella flicked a glance in her rearview mirror. The same blue car was riding her ass. She was going as fast as she dared on the slick roads. Maybe she should pull over and let them pass. She put on her blinker and slowed, maneuvering towards the side of the road. The car behind her didn’t reduce its speed though.

She didn’t have time to scream as the car jolted and a flash of blue zoomed by. Her car fishtailed and spun. She instinctively hit the brakes, which only made things worse as she coasted over black ice. The crash of glass and creak of metal boomed in her ears. The world spun as the car veered off the road out of her control, heading for a ditch.

Her son’s face flashed through her mind before everything went black.

49

NASH

Nash’s fingers were numb from the cold, but he didn’t do anything to warm them. He sat on the frozen stone, his pants damp with snow as he stared towards the tree line where they’d discovered Ana’s body.

He lifted the bottle of whiskey to his mouth and drank another mouthful. It didn’t even burn going down anymore. His thumb brushed against the clear bottle, the amber liquid reminding him of Bella’s eyes, so full of hurt last night.

She was better off without him. Everyone was. If it wasn’t for the baby, he might just leave. Go out on his boat and never look back. Get as far away from his pain as he could. Maybe then he could outrun this guilt over not being there when Ana needed him most. If he’d agreed to meet with her, she might still be alive.

The hum of an engine cut through his thoughts as another four-wheeler broke through the trees from the trail, his father driving. Nash stiffened and set the whiskey down beside him. His dad parked nearby and climbed off. Nash’s skin prickled under his scrutiny before his father approached and sat on the snow-covered stone beside him. They both stared out at the view in silence as minutes passed. Fat snowflakes drifted down from the grey overcast sky.

“She wouldn’t want you to blame yourself.”

Nash scoffed. “It’s my fault she’s fucking dead.”

“That’s not true—”

“It is!” Nash bolted to his feet, facing his father. Chest heaving, he confessed what he’d held in for so long. “I found out she’d been cheating on me. And I blew up at her. She left because of me—because I wasn’t enough.”