Chapter Thirty-Three
Who, moving others, are themselves as stone,
Unmoved, cold, and to temptation slow.
—Shakespeare, “Sonnet 94”
William paraded pastthem, the two boys, Patrick and Jonathon, following in line behind. The three of them had become fast friends over the last two weeks. The children weren’t certain of their ages. As far as Elizabeth could discern, Patrick was a year older than William, and Jonathon a few months younger. One thing Elizabeth was sure of—they were little balls of energy. Parson Brown was exhausted trying to keep up with them and was hinting she should consider making other arrangements.
“They begin framing next week, if the weather remains clear,” Elizabeth said. “I will soon need to look for staff.”
Sophia twirled her parasol as she studied the spot where the orphanage would go. “It is a big undertaking,” she said.
“It is, but it keeps me busy.”
“And you can avoid thinking about your marriage.”
Elizabeth ignored Sophia’s pointed statement. “I may take the boys in until the orphanage is built. Parson Brown is weary of them underfoot, and Mrs. Elder is a beast with them. Says she was hired to cook and clean, not chase vermin all day.”
“You are changing the subject,bella, but I shall let you. Are you sure it is wise to take these two into your home? There will be more children. You cannot take them all in,mia amica, no matter how big your heart.”
“Would that I could, but you are, of course, correct. I cannot take them all. But these two are before me now, and I can make a difference for them. At least temporarily. Nurture them and let them know someone cares. Look how happy William is. Look at the joy on their faces. And all three are so patient when Sebastian tries to join in their merriment.”
Her courses had started. Elizabeth had been both relieved and devastated. There was a time she and Richard had dreamed of filling the manor with children. That was never going to happen, but for a while, she could enjoy the sound of these boys bouncing off the walls. The orphanage would likely not be ready for months.
Sophia scooped Elizabeth’s elbow, and they walked back toward her coach. “Catherine tells me you have declined her invitation for a stay at Woodfield.”
“This is the last month she will have Nicholas all to herself. I’ll not rob her of it.” She didn’t add that she was in no mood to bear witness to a happy marriage. “Everything changes when a child arrives.”
“Then I am glad I have never had children,” Sophia said. “For had I love like theirs, I’d not want it to ever change.”
Emotion brewed, unexpected and harsh, bubbling up and clogging Elizabeth’s throat. She blinked back tears.
“Oh, bella, I have upset you.” She leaned in closer. “But I think maybe I do it deliberately.”
Elizabeth pulled her arm free and turned to her friend. Why would Sophia want to upset her?
“You cannot hide here forever.”
Elizabeth swiped at her eyes. “Two weeks is hardly forever.”
“It has been an eternity to me,” Sophia said dramatically. “After so much activity, I am finding country life horribly dull. And I am not hurting, like you. The nights are endless, no?”
She could not argue, for they were. Yet she had no desire for company except for Sophia’s.
“I have some business in London. Why don’t you come with me? You can stay at my house, if you’d like. Although, you must face Richard sooner or later.”
Elizabeth shook her head. Yes, she must, but she preferred later to sooner. She was too raw right now to hear his truth. Or worse, his lies. “I am not ready,” she said quietly.
Sophia studied her for a moment before speaking. “I will not push you…today. While I am in London, I will investigate this gossip and see if I can find out who this woman is, the one you think you caught in a compromising position.”
“Not think. I did. I know what I saw.” Anger surfaced again but was quickly smothered by grief.
“Ah, mia amica, of course. I am sorry.” Sophia leaned in and kissed each cheek. “I want only to make things better.”
“You do,” Elizabeth said, grateful to have a friend to trust with the full truth of her situation. “I do hope you won’t stay long in town. I will miss you.”
“Only as long as I need to. When I get back, I will expect more of you. I will throw afesta, and you will come. Yes, that is exactly what I will do.”
“Oh, Sophia, I don’t know when I will want to show my face in public again.”
“Mama, look at us. We are lions.” The boys roared, yellowed strands of grass sticking from their collars like manes. They clawed at one another and tumbled to the ground, laughing.
Sophia looked at them, her eyes narrowing thoughtfully. Her face lit up. “Yes! We will do like them and pretend. A masquerade. You will not need to show your face. It is brilliant, no?” Sophia hugged her quickly. “I will send out invitations before I leave.”
Elizabeth could not mirror Sophia’s excitement, nor could she slight her when she was working so hard to cheer Elizabeth up. She forced a smile and promised she would consider it. Which, of course, she would not. She’d find a suitable excuse when the time arrived.
The boys’ giggling subsided, and they all piled into the carriage, Sophia smiling triumphantly. Elizabeth would let her have this moment, but sooner or later, Sophia would have to accept that everything had changed for Elizabeth. She would never be the same. She looked at her sons, the heir and the spare. Those two women were right. Shewasa mare put out to pasture.