Page 4 of Into Temptation

But I won’t be having that. “No, take me home.”

“Punky, the castle is boggin’. There’s no electricity or water,” Darcy says, trying to make me see reason. But I don’t care.

“I’m not worried about that. I just want to go home.”

Hannah works her bottom lip, but Cian understands. “All right. If that’s what ya want.”

“I’ll come by after tea,” Darcy says, thankfully respecting my wishes. I appreciate everything she’s done for me, but that doesn’t mean she has a say in how I live my life.

Nodding, I follow Cian as he walks to a gray Ford Fiesta. I pause, not expecting my best friend to be driving such a…conservative car. However, I don’t say anything and get into the back. Hannah offers the front, but I decline.

Darcy beeps her horn as she zips past us before Cian starts our journey home. Hannah and Cian make small talk, leaving me to take everything in.

I stare out the window, refamiliarizing myself with the sights and sounds which shaped my life. But now, they’re foreign, and those memories are just out of reach. I see Northern Ireland with new eyes. So much has changed, while in the same breath, some things are frozen in time.

There is so much green. My eyes can’t adjust to the color. I once took this for granted, but I won’t ever again. I see a paddock filled with cows. I’d forgotten how big they were. I’ve forgotten a lot of things.

It’s suddenly too much, too fast.

Closing my eyes, I lean my head against the headrest and stay this way until Cian’s tires crunch over gravel. This sound transports me back in time.

I’m home.

Slowly opening my eyes, I adjust to the lighting, and when I see the castle, I wonder if I’m stuck in a nightmare. The once majestic building is now in shambles.

The windows are smashed in, and by the graffiti tags, it’s safe to assume they were broken by the hallions who thought it was okay to vandalize a place that once was the envy of many. The door is kicked in, and I notice the side wall is crumbling.

No matter how much I hated Connor, I never wanted to see his home end up this way. This was the last place his essence remained, and now, nothing is left. It’s just an empty shell housing broken memories.

Unsnapping my seat belt, I open the door and step outside. The fresh air fills my lungs, and I inhale deeply, the smells of the past warming me. It’s replaced with bitterness a second later.

“Punky, I don’t want ya stayin’ here,” Hannah says, her eyes nervously searching the grounds.

I know why she’s worried.

She told me she saw Sean here, lurking in the shadows like the monster that he is. But I’m not afraid of him. I want him to know I’m back and plan on claiming what is mine.

Cupping her cheek, I gently assure her, “I’ll be all right, wee one. Go now. I’m sure y’ve got better things to do than be here.”

“I want to be here,” she presses, leaning into my hand. “I never want to leave yer side.”

Cian stands off to the side, but it appears he shares the same sentiments as Hannah.

“I’m not goin’ anywhere. Ye made sure of that when ya fought for me when I didn’t even fight for myself.”

She sniffs back her tears.

“But I need some time to adjust. This is all…a lot.”

“Of course,” she replies with a nod. “Promise me ya won’t leave me again?”

Her plea breaks my heart because I crushed her when I left. I never realized how my actions would impact the twins. They were small, and I thought with time, they’d forget me. But I never forgot my ma, and I was a similar age to the twins when she was snatched from my life.

“I promise,” I assure her, bringing her in for a hug.

She clings on tight, and it’s hard not to reminisce about when she was a wain, holding me with all her might. “I’ll save him. I won’t fail ye again,” I whisper into her ear.

She sobs into my shoulder, her tiny body shuddering with her pain.

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