Page 25 of Queen of Mirrors and Madness

“As I said before,” Lucien says, waving a hand, “you’re welcome to join us.”

The innuendo brings a heat to my face, and Baxter clenches his jaw. “Perhaps another time,” he says, his tone sharp.

“Usually, he’s quick to decline,” Lucien whispers in my ear, “so that’s an improvement.”

“I’m not sure it is.”

Baxter walks across the room to seat himself at the head of the table. Being positioned between him and Lucien brings back all of the nervousness I’ve felt throughout the day. It hits me in a rush, causing my pulse to spike.

“Now, why don’t we discuss these memories of yours, hmm?” Baxter asks.

CHAPTER10

BAXTER

Afew hours earlier…

The shaking of my hands takes a long while to cease.

“Get it together, Baxter.”

I splash water on my face, but the chilly liquid cooling my skin does little to help me. Not after what I witnessed in the princess’s mind. Her nightmares—no, memories—were enough to bring me to my knees.

How is she still standing?

Begrudgingly, I admire the fortitude of the woman whose visions I saw.

Adelaide doesn’t remember anything, but when she does, it could wreck her to recall it all at once. That’s why I only broke through a few of the shields covering her mind. It was both for that reason and because I was hesitant to do more, inadvertently exposing myself further to the darkness.

I’m going to kill my brother when I see him again. That fucker, having lived most of his life at Court, had to have known what kind of shit I’d come across. My magic might allow me to see a person’s memories, but it doesn’t prevent them from seeping into my brain as if they were my own. It’s one of the main reasons I don’t use my ability often.

I walk over to the window and stare out at the grounds, leaning heavily on the windowsill. The manicured lawn and the greenhouse full of flowers stare up at me. As soon as my mood turned dark, the plants inside the glass building started singing in an attempt to cheer me. Those blossoms are the only creatures I allow on my property because of their kind nature.

Not all of Wonderland is wonderful.

Like madness, evil is everywhere. And spreading.

Adelaide’s presence in my home has reminded me of this, exacerbating my temper. But how I envy the princess’s lack of memory. What would it feel like not to be burdened with the past and all the pain it brings?

Now that I know more about the woman’s history, I find myself sympathizing with her while hating myself for it. Adelaide has no idea how her behavior affected everyone in the palace. Just as she has no idea that every man at Court vied for her attention.

Except me. I’ll never be one of the many lovers she fucks and casts aside.

Regardless of how tempting she is now.

Before, the woman known as Alice, disgusted me with her conquests, never taking the time to genuinely care for anyone but herself. ButAdelaideis different. She has a gentle and kind demeanor. Her shyness, and how she’s quick to flush over anything sexual in nature, is so unlike the person I knew at Court.

It maddens me.

I silently chastise myself as I dress for dinner, knowing I have to confront the princess with the knowledge I gleaned in her mind while remaining unsusceptible to her innocent persona. A part of me believes that she’s lying, that the whole thing is an act. But the things I saw tell a different story.

It’s not enough to clear her of the past transgressions, yet it’s not enough to convict her either.

This wouldn’t be such a challenge if she wasn’t so alluring.

Damn her.

And fuck me.

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