I nod. “Yup.”
He puts the bottle of water down on my desk and walks around to where I’m sitting. Bracing himself on the edge of the desk, he leans in facing me. So much for getting some space. “Did Nattie agree to watch Tommy for you?”
“Yes.” My voice comes out annoyingly breathy. “She wants him to sleep over at their house. I’m not sure though. Tommy hasn’t spent a night away from me since... Well... since I moved home. It makes me a little nervous.”
He thinks about that for a moment. “Well, you could always ask Nattie to watch him at your house.”
I’m not sure who’s going to have a harder time being apart that night, me or Tommy. “I know, but I don’t want to deny him something he might enjoy. I’m just...Well, I guess I’m just freaking out a little bit. Parenting sucks. It’s just so easy to second-guess yourself.”
“Jesus, Belle, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to put you in an uncomfortable position.”
Dear God, the positions I would like this man to put me in. “No, you didn’t. If I don’t force the two of us to try new things, Tommy and I would just live in our routine forever. He might really enjoy himself. And if he doesn’t, just be warned that we might need to make a hasty exit.”
“Like I told you earlier, that’s fine with me. Having you there might be the only thing that makes the night bearable.” His leg brushes against my tights, sending an electric current crackling through my skin.
I should move my leg away. But I just don’t want to. “Okay, you just redeemed yourself for saying I was one step above an escort.” I begrudgingly adjust myself so our bodies are no longer touching, no longer able to handle the way every single nerve feels like a live wire.
Why is this particular man so damn potent?
I absolutely hate the way I react to Declan. It’s been like this since the very first time I watched him walk into his father’s backyard last summer.
If I wanted a relationship, he’d be at the top of the list. Hell, he’d be the entire list. But what am I supposed to take time away from in order to date? The studio that’s barely keeping its head above water? My brother, who needs me to be a mother and a father? And what if we try it and it goes bad? Do I risk losing the only friends we have because they’re his family?
But what if...
What if he’s worth it?
Today, of all days, I’m reminded of how short life is.
How good the reward can be if you take the risk.
I’m just not sure Declan Sinclair is a risk I can afford to take.