Page 28 of Harvest Moon (Riverbend 3)

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She just needed a minute, was that too much to ask? But the last woman in line had done yoga with Mallory and seemed to think that made Laurel her new best friend. She’d spent at least five minutes consoling the woman.

She glanced at her friends’ caskets.Why did this have to happen, God?

And why was she asking the same Person she’d asked last time she’d been standing up here? She’d gotten no answers then either.

It seemed her grief over Mallory’s and Mike’s deaths wascompounded by memories of her son’s funeral. It was all too familiar: the creamy, clove-like scent of lilies, the low, sad murmuring of people, the overwrought melodies humming through the speakers. How could the pain still feel so raw after four years? Sometimes it just hit her like a tidal wave. Sometimes she justmissedhim so much. She ached for the weight of his body, for the always-sticky fingers, and the softness of his baby-fine hair.

Laurel had been pushing her emotions down for two and half hours, and she wasn’t sure how much longer she could manage. The Claytons were working their way toward the front row. The funeral would be starting soon.

Laurel patted the woman’s shoulder. “I’m so sorry for your loss, uh, Francine, but I have to slip out for a moment. Thank you for coming.”

“Of course. I’ll catch you later.”

Laurel kept her gaze on the floor as she sped from the room. Her mom had saved her a seat a couple of rows back and was no doubt trying to flag Laurel down. But she needed to collect herself.

She pushed through the door of what she remembered to be a prayer room. Light filtered through a sole window, spilling onto someone seated in one of the chairs. Her steps faltered.

Gavin. Still unaware of her presence, he hunched over, elbows on his knees. He sniffled.

Her heart squeezed tight. She was intruding on his pain. These past few days, their past a canyon between them, they’d grieved in private. At least she assumed that’s what he did.

She would just slip out unseen and find someplace else to collect herself.

But as she stepped backward the floor creaked beneath her.

His head came up and his gaze connected with hers. His facewas flushed, tears still streaming from his tragic eyes. His hair hung over his forehead, reminding her of that boy she’d fallen in love with so long ago.

The sight of him so broken propelled her forward. He held out his arms and she stepped into them, cradling his head to her stomach. His arms came around her.

After the initial period following their son’s death, they had grieved separately. Gavin was neck-deep in guilt, and she was devastated. He withdrew from her, leaving her isolated in her pain. Losing their son was hard enough, and grieving alone only added to the misery.

But four years had passed, and now she wasn’t so consumed with and blinded by her own grief. And as Gavin wept in her arms, her residual anger evaporated, making room for compassion.

This one time she could be here for him the way she now wished she could’ve been before. This was the way they should’ve grieved their son.

Her throat thickened with emotion as she threaded her fingers through his hair. Was he thinking of their son? Of Mike and Mallory? Emma? There was so much to grieve. Tears trickled down her own face, one loss melding into another.

She lowered her face to his head and breathed in the familiar scent of his shampoo. She’d missed him. She didn’t want to admit it, but there it was. When she’d lost Jesse, she’d lost Gavin too. And it was all just too much. She thought she’d never pull herself back together. Why even try?

Just remembering how difficult it had been, coming out of that fetal position, made her stiffen, put that wall back in place.

He must’ve felt her withdrawal. He loosened his grip and eased away, giving her a speculative look. His tear-ravaged facethreatened to pull her under again. Tension wove around them like a bad spell.

She tore her gaze away, took a step back, and cleared her throat. “The funeral will be starting soon. Where’s Emma?”

“My mom has her. She’s asleep.”

“Good. I’ll see you out there.”

Chapter12

Gavin’s shoulders sagged as he closed the door behind the last of the guests. It had been a long day, and it wasn’t even suppertime yet. Not that he could even think about food.

He went to the office and let Sunny out, gave her a little affection. “Sorry, girl. You missed all the excitement.” But the dog’s nose was already leading her through the living room. She stopped by the coffee table where her tongue lapped out, capturing a cube of cheese.

He glanced toward the kitchen where Paul and Judy were tidying up. Mrs.Clayton had seemed more comfortable working behind the scenes today than mingling with the guests. He couldn’t blame her.

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