Page 68 of Dr. Off Limits

Sutton

Norfolk seemed a long time ago, even though we’d only been back a week. Before we’d given into each other, I’d been concerned my feelings for him would be displayed in glaring speech bubbles over my head. Now I was worried our intimacy would be revealed in a misplaced touch or a prideful glance. I was still always on my guard when he was around.

“Are you heading to the cafeteria?” Veronica asked as she came up beside me.

“Yup, you?”

“Yes. We can have lunch together. How often does that happen?”

“I don’t think it’s happened since those first two weeks, which feels like a lifetime ago,” I said.

“Right? Two months has gone by in a flash. How’s it going? Got a day off anytime soon?”

“I just had three days off in a row. Not sure how I managed that one.”

“Wow, are you banging the person in charge of the rota?”

I laughed, trying to sound as genuine as possible, despite the fact that her question left me a little on edge. I knew Jacob hadn’t said anything about the rota—he wouldn’t risk it—but her question had cut a little too close to the bone. “I thought we all were.”

She cackled, the kind of laugh that came from a place of sheer desperation to laugh. I got it. “Wouldn’t it be good if the canteen sold wine?”

We continued down the corridor, moving to the side when a bed was wheeled toward us, then we rounded the corner toward the café.

“Absolutely not,” I said. “Too tempting.”

“That’s true. So how’s it going? How’s peds? You think that’s where you might want to end up?”

We turned into the café and each grabbed a tray. “Way too early to say. How about you? Are you enjoying A&E?”

We joined the queue for the salad bar. And then we’d be in the line for chips. The two were inextricably linked.

“Honestly, I think it’s good experience but I don’t think I could do it my entire career. You’re basically holding people together with sellotape until a specialist can see them.” She covered her mouth and looked around, hoping she hadn’t offended anyone. “I’m not saying there isn’t skill involved—of course there is. It’s just, I think I’d rather be more focused.”

“That’s fair,” I said. “And all the lates and the weekends. That wouldn’t ever stop, even when you made consultant.”

“Exactly. I’m not sure I can handle it.” Veronica ordered an egg salad and I picked the halloumi. Without discussing it, we joined the queue for chips.

“Andy’s loving it, though. So are Claudia and Garth. In fact, Claudia seems like the department star. I’m sure she’s going to be in the running for foundation award.”

For some inexplicable reason, my stomach pinched in irritation. “Really? For the rotation or the big award?”

“Both? You know what it’s like with the stars. They show their true colors immediately.”

I knew I wanted to fly under the radar. I’d learned from the arguments that prefaced my parents’ divorce that big, explosive scenes rarely helped anyone. I didn’t want anyone to have a reason to stop and look at me more closely. So why did jealousy snake up my spine when Veronica spoke about Claudia being an obvious star? Maybe because had things been different—had my parents not split up and my mother become obsessed with finding and keeping another man—things might have been easier. I might not have had to put myself through university by hairdressing.

I might be an obvious star.

“I hear Gilly’s scoring highly with Dr. Off Limits.”

I frowned. “Scoring highly?” I asked.

“Apparently, he thinks she’s great. Is she getting all the best cases and stuff?”

I thought about it. “Not that I’ve noticed. Where did you hear that?” Was that the reason Jacob had told me to believe in myself? Was he trying to let me know I needed something extra in order to make a mark?

“She told me so, so of course it could be bullshit.”

“Probably. I don’t share every shift with her, so maybe she’s making a mark and I’m just not seeing it.”

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