Page 40 of The Commanders' Mate

Oh fuck.

“You should go, love. We will worry over you otherwise,” Ronan said.

That was obviously the wrong thing to say since her mouth dropped o

pen and she looked like Chloe had the time she made her mates sleep in the fighters’ quarters for two nights.

“I am Lady Karter. I am here to assume my duties to lead my people. I do not need your permission, Lord High and Mighty. I will do what needs to be done, and you aren’t going to stop me.” Magnificent, perfect fucking female.

Leaning down, I whispered in her ear. “I can spank your ass, tie you up and carry you back to the transport pad.”

She turned her head slightly so our lips almost touched. “You can try,” she threatened. “If you do so, Kaed, then the testing was wrong, and I will not return. I will not be dictated to or coddled like a child. I am your mate, not a pair of boots to be tossed away when it’s not convenient for you to have me around.”

I arched a brow at her comment. Ronan came over so he stood beside us both. The group of commanders was probably still behind us, but I paid them no attention. I was focused solely on Erica as her words sank into my body. My soul. She was deadly serious. If I sent her away now, I would lose her forever.

My silence must have softened her heart, at least a little, for her tone was gentle when she spoke next, Ronan and I both leaning forward to catch every word.

“You disrespect me by not finding me worthy of my role. I do not wish to be reckless with my safety, but I will not walk away when my people need me, when you need me.”

“Mate,” Ronan said. “We would never disrespect you.”

She turned and looked up at him. “But you have. You doubt our match.”

I shook my head. “No. Never.”

“Yet you think the testing didn’t match you to someone strong enough to be at your side, to share your burdens, to take on the role of Lady Karter before your people. You expect me to walk among them, unclaimed, and explain to every curious eye why you have chosen not to claim me?”

I hadn’t thought of it that way. Our lack of collar dishonored her and embarrassed her in front of my people. Her people.

“I trust you in your jobs. I trust that Ronan is careful when he goes out into the field. Chloe explained the I.C. to me and I know it is full of… peril. And you, being commander of an entire battlegroup, means you deal with bad stuff. You forget I arrived from Earth into the middle of a disaster. Why can’t you trust me to handle myself in the same way?”

“We live under constant threat of attack,” I told her.

She tilted her head to the side to look around me. “Chloe, where’s your family?”

I heard the female’s light footsteps as she approached. “Seth is boarding a freighter with the kids now. I showed the children how to make up constellations in the sky and it will keep them entertained on the journey. Seth will be in the safe zone with them while Dorian flies in one of the advance search groups.”

Erica looked up at me again. “Her children have been on this ship all their young lives. If Chloe keeps them here, then don’t belittle me by assuming me too weak to stay as well.”

I clenched my hands into fists. “I will not have you harmed or exposed to the horrors of my job. Of Ronan’s.”

“Too late. I had warrior’s blood on my hands the very first time you touched me, do you not remember?”

Ronan looked to me, and I could read his mind as if he were a comm message, a message I finally received. Erica wasn’t the problem, I was. I was afraid of hurting her, losing her. Afraid the violence of my mind would frighten her away.

But if I did nothing, refused to take this chance, to trust her, I would lose her anyway.

“You will not remain on the Karter. You will go to the safe zone and lead. The PC will prep you before you leave and assign her top people to assist you.”

The smile that lit her face was brilliant. In that moment, I knew I’d underestimated Erica. I’d thought, perhaps not even consciously, that she was weak. Incapable of life on the Karter. Of leading those under her care. I should have known better; from the first minutes in her company, she’d gone to tend to others.

She had a caring heart and a need to serve and I’d taken that from her.

“I won’t go without a collar.”

Ronan smirked and I crossed my arms over my chest.

“Now you give the orders?” I asked.

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