Page 11 of Now and Forever

He liked me; there was no mistaking it. But his bold compliments hadn’t necessarily bought me over yet.

“Well, thanks all the same,” I said as I grasped my drink from the counterpane. “See you around.” I threw him a frown before walking back on the deck, barefoot, and quite unsure what to make of that impromptu incident with Jack Yates. No way in hell would I tell my friends, though. They’d take it as a sign that I’d let him “chase Jared out of my vag.”

The image of Jared standing in the foyer while waiting for me to show up still made me feel like a totally cold-hearted person. It was awful to do that to him, but I feared had I declined his offer, since I’d already said yes to his previous invitation, that he wouldn’t take no for an answer the second time. I had taken the easy way out, but it had been the only way I could get away from him without drawing suspicion. It had been eight days since that night, and he hadn’t left my thoughts since.

Had I crossed his mind? With his active sex life, he’d probably replaced Yovanna in his bed. His job was demanding, and one of the ways he unleashed stress was through sex—obliterating, mind-numbing, titillating, out of this world sex. And based on my one-time experience with him, Jared was also a demanding lover. Had I gone with him back to the hotel, he’d have taken me a few more times. The hunger I felt vibrating off his body as he thrust inside me was too intense to die out quickly. He’d have expelled all his strength and energy on me. Those sinful lips of his whispered the delightful things he intended to do to me the second he had me fully naked and at his disposal—all night long, he promised.

My bosom felt heavy. I could feel my aroused nipples straining against the fabric of my bikini. A shiver ran through me at thought of him. To this day, I could still feel him inside me, throbbing, larger than life.

Oh, Jared, I thought with great regret. Was it foolish of me to walk away? The question still haunted me, but the truth also couldn’t be denied, Jared lusted after Lexi, not the real me. So, debating and harping over it was futile since he never cared to look at me twice.

Admitting the truth still profoundly wounded me.

Unrequited love. It was the most damning kind of emotion. Like a whirlpool, it sucked you in and it ceaselessly spun in a maddening merry-go-round, never stopping until it had drained you dry and stripped you of any inhibitions, of any rights, until you’d surrendered. It mercilessly took you apart piece-by-piece; it dismantled you, pillaging every layer you had until you were fully exposed, barren and unshielded from its fickle clutch.

It perfectly depicted my sorry state. From the very moment my eyes caught sight of him, I’d been drawn to him. One obliterating look was all it took to make me fall at his feet. Try as I might to get his unwavering attention, the man simply wasn’t interested in me.

Nothing like being doused with ice-cold truth. It stung like no other.

It is time to move on, I thought with a heavy pang in my heart. Pining for a man who plainly saw me as Peter Weber’s daughter was a waste of time.

Tonight, maybe I’d decide to walk on the wild side. Maybe Jack Yates wasn’t a bad idea, after all.

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