Page 97 of The Finding Series: Vol. 2

“That’s not what you saw-”

“What I saw was you taking advantage of a guy you know is too messed up to know any better.”

“Fuck you, Quinn,” I snapped. “You don’t know shit.” I refused to release him when he tried to tug his arm free. “You’ve been ignoring him all week and now you’ve got your dick in a twist because of something you think you saw.”

“He asked us for two things, Brody! One of which was not to talk about that night! Do you really think he wants a repeat?” Quinn nearly shouted. His body crowded me back until my body hit the wall of glass that faced the courtyard.

“I wasn’t making a move on him. But hell if I’m gonna tell him no if he decides he wants more.” My body was wired with energy as the heat and electricity from Quinn’s body burned through me. “I’m sorry if that’s hard for you to watch-”

That was all I got out before Quinn’s mouth suddenly smashed down on mine. The force of his kiss knocked my head backwards against the glass, but I was too surprised to even notice the momentary flash of pain. My body lit up like a brushfire as Quinn’s mouth stole over mine and his tongue sought entry. I gave it to him instantly and moaned when his hot flesh stroked over mine. His big hands closed over my wrists, pinning my hands next to my head and his groin brushed mine as he pressed me against the glass.

When I’d first started exploring my sexuality, I’d let other men dominate me, but after a few too many overly aggressive experiences, I’d begun taking on the dominant role and had started only picking partners who were naturally submissive. There was nothing submissive about Quinn or the way he was owning me in that moment. And for once, I had no desire to turn the tables.

He kissed me for what seemed like hours, but was probably only seconds, before he tore his mouth free of mine. We were both panting heavily and he seemed just as surprised as me at what had happened. “I’m not jealous, you asshole,” he muttered. “I would give almost anything to see the two of you together again.”

What?

“Then why-” I began.

“I interrupted you because it scares the ever-loving shit out of me what might happen if he freaks out like he did the last time.” Quinn paused briefly before saying, “You weren’t the one who saw his car hit that tree, Brody. I know it was an accident, but what if the next time he loses it, it isn’t?”

Quinn still had me pinned, but I made no move to free myself. His dark eyes were heavy with worry and his brow was drawn tight. If my hands had been free, I would have used one to try to smooth the worry lines away.

“He asked us not to see him that way, Quinn,” I reminded him.

“And I’m trying really hard not to.”

“Is that why you’ve been ignoring him this week?” I asked softly.

“I haven’t,” he said with a shake of his head, but when his eyes met mine, he fell silent for a moment. “That’s part of it,” he finally said. “Things were getting too heavy,” he murmured. “After that day in my truck.”

I knew he was talking about the day when Beck had offered him comfort after Hunter and Roman had learned their daughter’s adoption had come through.

“I’m not sure I can stay away from him,” I admitted. Quinn released me and I instantly missed the sensation of his skin on mine.

“I know,” was all he said.

“And you just made it really fucking hard to keep my promise to stay away from you,” I said softly.

Quinn raised his eyes again briefly before they fell to my mouth. I held still as he brought his thumb up to trace my lower lip. I shivered at the sensation.

“I know,” he said again. “But I meant what I said…I’m not looking to start up something.”

“Why not?” I asked. “Are you in a relationship or something? Is this Griff guy-”

“He’s dead,” Quinn interjected. “He was my husband and I buried him two years ago, after a bunch of homophobic, sick fucks beat him to death because he refused to hide who he was.”

“Quinn-”

“I had my shot at happiness, Brody. It’s gone and I have no interest in trying to get it back.”

Quinn stepped back from me, his eyes going hard. “Be careful with him,” he said and then he was moving past me.

My mind raced as my body struggled to recover from the moment. Was Quinn right? Would pursuing something with Beck, even if he instigated it, do more harm than good? I’d been honest when I’d told Beck I didn’t look at him and only see someone who’d tried to end his life. But the fact was that he had, and I had no idea why or if it was something that was still on his radar. The mere fact that he had been so upset at finding pleasure in sex was a big red flag that he probably had some pretty messed up views about sex. Was I really willing to risk sending him over that edge again just so I could see if there was something between us?

I had my answer before I even finished the question.

Quinn was right. I needed to be careful. And I needed to start by keeping my hands off the young man and be what I’d said I’d be.

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