Page 109 of The Finding Series: Vol. 2

Surprisingly, the physical exhaustion hadn’t been as crippling as I thought it’d be. It had only been a few weeks since I’d arrived in Dare and yet that urge to stay in bed and hide away from the world wasn’t there. Even with the poor quality of my sleep, I still felt more energized than I ever had after sleeping twenty hours a day, day after day, during my dark times. I’d also found that the need to steer clear of others had diminished too. I’d spent a couple nights in the past week at Dane and Jax’s house for dinner and while I hadn’t exactly been an expert conversationalist, I’d held my own and it hadn’t felt awkward or forced. I’d actually enjoyed telling Dane and Jax about the work I was doing with the horses. My nerves still got the best of me whenever I was alone with Jax for any extended period of time, but I’d managed to get through those times without having to make an excuse to escape his company.

I’d spoken with my fathers several times via video chat and even they’d commented that country life seemed to be agreeing with me. I hadn’t told them about my relationship with Quinn and Brody, of course, but I’d given them a virtual tour of the barn and the horses and they’d asked me lots of questions about my work with the large animals.

And not one question about how I was doing…at least not in the way they’d so often asked before. In the past, that question had always been asked with a certain level of fear and hesitation…like they didn’t really want to know. Now the question was a benign one…a conversation starter and nothing more.

But the biggest change I was dealing with was my burgeoning feelings for Quinn and Brody. At some point, and I couldn’t pinpoint precisely when it had happened, I’d started to want something more from both men besides the promise of pleasure they’d both given me. I loved watching them interact and I’d found myself waiting in anticipation for any time either one smiled or laughed or looked at me in that way that warmed my insides.

Like maybe I was more than just some pathetic kid who needed special handling.

I wasn’t sure what I’d do if everything between us was based on pity. I tried not to think about it much because whenever I did, I could feel the darkness threaten to consume me and I was enjoying the light too much to let that happen.

Which was why I hadn’t pressed the lack of sex issue. The last time we’d been intimate which had been at the mountain pool more than a week earlier, I’d managed to not have a freak out moment, but I wasn’t sure what would happen if things went any further.

“Okay, she’s all set,” Dane said, ripping me back to the present.

I loosened my hold on Harley and she immediately snuggled her little body against my chest.

“Thank you,” I said as I ran my hand soothingly over the dog’s back.

“You’re welcome,” Dane said as he began cleaning up his supplies. “You’re really good with her,” he continued. “You have the touch.”

“The touch?” I asked.

“Animals seem to instinctively trust you. You ever thought about turning that into a career?”

Surprise shot through me.

And to be honest, a shard of pride too, because Quinn had told me something similar.

“What, like do what I’m doing at the ranch full-time?” I asked in confusion.

“That,” Dane said. “Or you could go to vet school. Or if the idea of that much school doesn’t appeal to you, quality vet techs are in high demand.”

Speech escaped me as his words washed through me. “Um, my grades weren’t great in high school…” I murmured, even as Dane’s words took root deep inside of me. I hadn’t ever been around animals as a kid, but I’d always enjoyed interacting with my extended family’s menagerie of animals. But I’d never thought it was something I could build a life around.

Which wasn’t a surprise since most of my energy went to just getting through each day.

“Did you like your science classes? Biology, anatomy?”

I nodded. After my doctor had gotten me on the right dosage of anti-depressants this past year, I’d managed to focus a bit better in class. I hadn’t liked the more creative classes like art and English, but I’d done okay in science and math.

“If you can get strong grades in those kinds of classes in your undergraduate program, vet school isn’t an impossibility. And vet tech courses aren’t as stringent. You could even do the vet tech courses first and work in the field while taking part-time college classes and then decide if you want to pursue vet school.”

The ember of hope Dane had sparked to life grew with every word he said and I had to force myself to loosen my grip on Harley when she squirmed in my hold.

Was something like that really possible?

I blinked back tears at the prospect.

“I’ll…I’ll think about it,” I managed to get out.

If Dane noticed the tremor in my voice, he was kind enough not to point it out. “Great,” he simply said. “If you have any questions, I’m glad to answer them.”

My throat was so tight all I could do was nod. I used the excuse of setting Harley on the ground to cover my shaking hands and then followed Dane to the front office. His receptionist had left for the day so I watched him go to the computer to type something into it.

“Okay, we’ll need to see Harley again in about a month for boosters.”

I nodded. My eyes caught on a display in the corner of the waiting room. A rack with several leashes and collars sat next to a shelf with all sorts of toys and pet supplies. I went over to it and fingered a pretty red leather collar and while I was tempted, the price was more than I could afford. I’d gotten my first paycheck earlier in the week but I was saving most of it to put towards paying my fathers back for the damage to my car after the accident. Insurance had covered most of the cost, but I wanted to pay the deductible myself, despite my parents’ insistence that it wasn’t necessary. And with the cost of Harley’s care today, it was going to be tight.

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