Page 65 of The Finding Series: Vol. 2

The soft, very feminine voice was unexpected and I opened my eyes, not bothering to pretend I was just waking up. “How?” I asked as I took in the little girl standing just a few feet from my bed. She had long dark hair that was currently in pigtail braids and she was wearing a pair of pink cutoff overalls with white flowers on the legs and a frilly white shirt. She had two tiny kittens snuggled up against her chest that couldn’t have been more than six weeks old.

She shrugged and I dismissed her observation as one of the mysteries that came with being a pre-tween girl. My own sister had gotten that shrug down to an art form when she’d been this girl’s age.

“You’re Emma, right?” I asked, not bothering to sit up. If she’d been one of her fathers, I would have made more of an effort, but I’d take a few more minutes of not having to play the role of well-adjusted guest if I could get it.

Emma nodded and sat on the edge of my bed. “Here,” she said as she handed me one of the kittens. “You can help me feed them.”

While my only real interest was in closing my eyes and losing myself in sleep for as long as I possibly could, I took the kitten and put it on the bed next to my chest as I levered myself up on my arm. Emma handed me a small bottle full of milk. I watched as she offered the nipple to the kitten she was holding lovingly in her lap. The kitten instantly latched onto the bottle so I did the same with mine and was satisfied when the kitten began hungrily sucking on the bottle.

“What are their names?” I asked.

“Daddy says their new moms and dads should get to name them,” Emma said easily and then she leaned over to adjust the way I was holding the bottle.

“They’re not yours?”

She shook her head. “God just brought them to us to watch over for a while.”

I nodded in understanding. I knew one of her fathers was a veterinarian so it didn’t surprise me that the family would end up with a slew of unwanted animals.

“I get sad sometimes,” Emma said as she looked up at me with her pretty blue eyes. “But Dad says every time we say goodbye to one, it’s like telling God we’re ready for another one.”

“Makes sense,” I said.

From what I’d seen the day before when I’d stepped over the threshold of the small Victorian house, they’d been saving a lot of animals because I’d counted at least four cats and three dogs. I’d also heard some kind of parrot, though I hadn’t seen it. There’d been various livestock in pens out by the barn too, though I wasn’t sure how many were permanent residents versus guests of the attached veterinary practice that was housed on the same property.

We sat in silence as the kittens nursed. I sensed motion to my left and glanced over my shoulder to see a little boy, no more than two, come into the room and head for a box of toys in the corner.

“That’s Swirl,” Emma said as she nodded to the boy. “This is his room.”

I’d guessed as much based on the zoo animals painted on the wall and endless supply of toys and books taking up one side of the room and spilling over into the closet. The twin bed I was sleeping in was likely the child’s as well, though the bedding was a neutral color like you’d find in any guest room.

“Swirl?” I asked, lifting a brow.

“His name’s really Ben, but I heard Daddy and Dad telling Uncle Finn that he was a swirl baby, so…”

I chuckled at that because I suspected what the little girl was talking about, though I doubted she did. My own fathers had recently welcomed twins via surrogacy and they’d been the product of both my fathers’ sperm being mixed – or swirled – during the in-vitro process so that the only way to truly know who was the biological father was to test the child’s DNA.

Ben came over to the bed, his arms full of toys and stopped in front of his sister. He didn’t say anything, just looked at her expectantly. She gave him a baleful look and sighed. I was surprised when she placed the other kitten next to the one I was feeding. “If I don’t play with him, he gets cranky,” she explained in an exasperated voice. But it was all for show because I saw her take the little boy’s hand in hers as she led him from the room, closing the door behind her.

“What should I do with these guys?” I called as I motioned to the kittens.

But Emma must not have heard me because she didn’t respond. The kitten she’d been feeding had fallen asleep and the one I was feeding seemed to be on the verge of doing the same even as its mouth remained curled around the nipple. I gently pulled the bottle free and set it on the nightstand and watched as the kitten pressed against its sibling. I rested my head on my hand as I used my other to test the softness of the kittens’ fur.

They were so small and helpless.

I felt unexpected tears sting the backs of my eyes. I couldn’t really explain the wayward emotion, but it wasn’t an unheard-of occurrence for me. Yeah, most days I was just numb, but every once in a while, there’d be something deep inside of me that would break free…like a sliver of sunlight during a violent thunderstorm.

Like two nights before.

The tears dried up even before they could fall as the humiliation crashed over me. I lowered myself back down to the bed and settled my eyes on the window, mindful of the kittens next to me. I wasn’t sure who’d opened the curtains, but I distinctly remembered closing them after I’d stumbled into the room twenty-four hours ago, my ass sore and my insides burning with shame.

I’d been planning the stop at theThe Blue Doorclub from the moment I’d left Seattle and I’d spent the first several hours of my trip coming up with the lies I would need to tell my fathers to explain why I wasn’t driving straight through to Dare as planned. I’d spent the rest of the drive in excited anticipation. I’d found the club online and had even managed to find a few comments on the site from satisfied customers who’d unabashedly shared stories about their experiences. It was how I’d known that the place was so much more than just a place to hook up. And that it would meet my needs perfectly.

From the moment I’d walked through the front door, I’d been like a hunter seeking out his prey, though I’d known most of the patrons, like the bear who’d sought me out at the bar, would have seen it as being the other way around. He’d told me as much with all the things he’d said he wanted to do to me…to show me what it was like to be with a real man.

I’d nearly laughed at that. He’d pegged me as some naïve little innocent who was looking for an exciting and forbidden encounter.

He’d had no fucking clue why I was there.

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