Page 27 of Charming Cruel Boys

With a hesitant nod, my heart literally thundering in my chest, I cross the room and sit across from him. Duke smiles warmly at me and the tension leaves his shoulders. Then he starts to sing.

The thing about falling in love is,

it’s alright until you hit the ground.

When everything breaks apart,

it leaves you bleeding out.

But it’s worth the risk of pain,

to hear her say my name.

You see, I know this girl, she’s my whole world,

and I know we’ve only begun.

Being with her is like a breath of fresh air,

it’s opening my eyes and seeing new colors.

She’s woven into my DNA, and if she walks away,

I’ll suffer as a shell of the man she knew.

Duke stops, letting the last chord echo around the room while he holds my eye contact. Finally, he bites his lip and drops his gaze, pushing his fingers through his hair. “It’s not done yet. I just wanted to show you what I have so far, and let you know how I feel. I thought it was a better idea than a last minute dinner date.”

I nod mutely and swallow over the lump in my throat. Duke used to write little songs for me all the time. I didn’t realize how much I missed it until this moment. Having someone write down their feelings for me and create something beautiful from it is a treasure. It means even more to someone like me who was never toldI love yougrowing up.

“Remi?” he asks as he moves closer to me. He swipes a hand down his face and winces. “It was stupid, right? I’m trying too hard.” He shakes his head and gives me a sad smile. “I messed up too bad when I didn’t chase you and now I’ll never get another chance.”

Standing in front of him, I take his hand, shaking my head. “Don’t say never,” I whisper.

“Are you sure?” he asks, closing the distance between us.

I close my eyes to fight the fiery desire he causes. Now is not the time to jump his bones, but maybe it is time to let down some of my walls. With a deep breath, I say, “You were dealing with a huge loss, Duke. If you hadn’t been struggling so badly, you would have known that I wouldn’t just leave you like that. I understand how muddled emotions can be when life gets hard. Am I still angry about the way you handled it? Absolutely. You broke my heart and I’ve had to hear all about the other girls you’ve been with since me.”

Duke turns his head away from me, but not before I catch the look of disgust and shame on his face. “I’m sorry. I was trying to purge you from my mind, that’s all they ever were. It would fucking gut me to hear about who you’ve been with.”

My face flames because there isn’t anyone else. There’s only ever been Duke. I’ve been living a life of celibacy while he’s been trying to replace me. That makes me feel really stupid to admit though, so I keep my lips sealed. I rest my forehead on his shoulder, hiding my face and getting lost in his woodsy cologne. “Alright,” I mumble. “I was going to make you grovel a hell of a lot more, but the truth is, I miss you and I’m lonely. Living with you and not being able to beussucks.”

Duke nods and wraps his arms around me. “Why don’t we talk about what beingusmeans now?”

The bell chimes, signaling the end of lunch, and cutting our conversation short. I sigh and lean away from Duke, but he grabs my chin and plants a soft kiss to my lips before letting me go with a charming, bright smile.

“We’ll continue this later?” he asks hopefully.

I give him a small grin and nod, and he walks me to my next class.

***

The next day, I’m chatting with George in between classes, my mind only half present because I can’t stop thinking about Duke and his song.

“Why are you so distracted?” he asks.

“I’m sorry,” I say with a laugh. “I’m extremely interested in the camping trip you and your sister are going on next month, I promise.” I bat my lashes and he chuckles, shoving my shoulder.

“Alright, what’s on your mind, then?”