Page 62 of Beautiful Devil

“She’s my mother, Kostya. I love her. She was my world and I feel grateful that I was allowed the beautiful connection. What I said to you was cruel and heartless. I’m sorry.” He allowed me to stroke the side of his face, his eyes locked with mine.

Then he’d pushed me off his lap, moving almost instantly toward the open door. Even though he’d allowed me to get as close to him as I suspected anyone had before, the man still confused the fuck out of me. His behavior was infuriating, driving me into another state of madness.

“What do you want me to say, Kostya? Or does this mean you’re going to punish me for mouthing off to you?”

He took a deep breath, continuing to glance toward the ocean. I could only imagine the kind of thoughts that drove him to such violence.

“You don’t need to apologize to me, Emily. You only spoke the truth. I wish I could be a different man for you, but that’s not possible. However, I respect and honor your need to see your dying mother.”

The hidden agenda was lurking just below the surface. “But you need me to question her about whatever my father left for me.”

When he turned to face me, both our emotions were all over the place. “Yes.”

A simple, single word with no explanation. I backed away, suddenly feeling more naked than I’d felt before around him. I folded my arms, noticing Kiki was staring at us intently. As I stared at her, she thumped her tail, crawling to the edge of the bed and allowing her paws to dangle over the edge. There was such a beautiful brightness in her eyes, the desire to please her master in the forefront of her mind. And there was no doubt in my mind that he loved her with all his heart. I suspected he’d even die in order to keep her safe.

“You’re capable of love, Kostya. I only wish you’d allow yourself to experience the joys and sorrows that it brings. Maybe then you’d be able to develop a conscience.” The words weren’t said to irritate or crucify him, but they needed to be said. He needed to hear them. I headed toward the bathroom, craving privacy and silence, although I doubted that I’d discover either one. I stopped just short of walking inside. “When are we leaving?”

“As soon as possible.”

“I need to make certain the cub is alright. He’s a little fighter. I’m no expert, but it’s possible I can return him to Aziza’s care.”

“That would be good.”

He couldn’t even have any emotion with regard to the lion he also seemed to adore. What had he been forced to endure that had driven any inkling of caring out of his soul? I honestly didn’t want to learn.

Not that it would matter.

He’d continue to shut me out because doing anything else would require him to experience the darkness and heartache of raw emotions. As I closed the door behind me, leaning against the solid wood, all I could think about was having the man burst through the door, taking me into his arms and telling me that when my mother was gone, I’d never be alone.

That would never happen.

Kostya Baranov could never love anyone, least of all the girl he’d kidnapped.

* * *

I nuzzled the cub, adjusting the blanket as Kostya headed away from the clinic, the truck bouncing over the rough terrain. The tiny lion was playful, his eyes remaining open as he grabbed at my fingers. There was such joy on his face, his tiny growls the only real reminder that he was a wild animal. I could feel the heat of Kostya’s constant glances and sensed he was having difficulty remaining the brooding captor.

“He likes you,” he finally said.

“Animals have an incredibly innate sense for evil, their sixth senses more sensitive than humans.”

“Good versus evil?”

“Something like that.”

“Which is why it surprises you that Kiki tolerates me.”

I threw him a look, curious as to why he cared what I thought in the first place. His jaw had remained clenched the entire time, the lines on his face highlighting a heightened level of pain that he could never express. “Honestly, I never thought about it until now. She adores you and whether you want anyone to see it or not, you love her with all your heart.”

“Don’t read so much into everything, Emily. I provide food and water, shelter and a few toys. That’s all.”

“This is where I say bullshit.”

I hadn’t expected that he’d burst into laughter. When he did, it was as if the sun exploded across the sky. “You have no fear of me any longer.”

“Am I fearful of what you can do? Yes, but I’m not afraid of the man, at least the one you’ve allowed me to see briefly.”

He huffed, shaking his head in disbelief. “When did you know you wanted to be a pediatrician?”

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