Page 123 of Judgment

“I’m coming with you.” He pulls me close, like he can’t stand the thought of being away from me.

I meet his gaze. “Please stay here with her.” I swallow hard. “In case—” I can’t finish the thought.

I know Julian loves my mother, but if I can’t be here I want Andre to be here.

He’s mine and it makes me feel like I will still be here too.

His jaw sets and his nostrils flare but he finally nods.

Julian stands. “I’ll take her.”

That seems to relax Andre a little, but his hands remain on my body. He lifts my chin and brushes a kiss over my lips. “Hurry back to me, dusha moya.”

I love the way those two words flow through his lips. I don’t know what they mean, but the reverent way he says them tells me as much as I can handle right now. Maybe I’ll ask him someday when my heart isn’t splitting in half.

“I will.” I pull the coat tighter, breathing in the scent of my mother’s perfume as I hustle away, pausing at the nurses’ station in the center of the floor to ask where the closest bathroom is.

“Just outside the ICU. On your right.” She presses the button to unlock the security doors. “Hit the buzzer when you’re back and I’ll let you in.”

I manage a smile I don’t feel. “Thanks.”

Julian opens the heavy door for me then follows me out into the silent hall. It’s the middle of the night so the place is deserted, which means I’m all by myself in the bathroom.

I quickly do my business, then wash my hands, drying them off as I stare at myself in the mirror.

Sometime very soon the girl looking back at me will be motherless.

But not alone.

I can’t imagine what this moment would be like if Andre hadn’t stepped from the shadows that night.

It would be much different than it is and infinitely more difficult, I’m sure of that.

I take a deep breath and shove my hands into the pockets of the coat, as ready as I will ever be for what’s coming my way.

My fingers brush along a cold metal tube.

I pull it free and stare down at the smooth gold cylinder. I pop the cap off and twist the bottom, lifting up what’s left of my mother’s favorite lipstick.

There’s no telling how old it is or how long it’s been in her pocket, but the color is still just as bright and bold as I remember it.

Just like her.

I lift my eyes to my reflection, only hesitating a second before reaching up to slide the lipstick across my lips, carefully filling them in. I gently press them together, making sure not to smudge anything, as I recap the tube and tuck it back into her pocket.

Madison was right.

I do look pretty good in red lipstick.

I don’t feel half bad in it either, all things considered.

I might not feel as great as Richard and Bianca tried to convince me I would, but it’s just lipstick, not a miracle.

I give myself one more glance before walking out of the bathroom to where Julian is waiting for me.

But it’s not Julian standing right outside the door.

“Hello, Duchess.”