The driver’s call to disengage from the bus was making me nervous. I would wait for everyone else to get off the bus first to make sure it was safe. I didn’t want Rocky showing up. What if he followed the bus route? What if he knew where I was going?

He didn’t know the stop, but he knew to find me at the bus depot. I seemed destined to lead a life on the run. I wanted to call Bear and tell him, but it didn’t seem right. It seemed pointless to me, because even with his protection, Rocky might go through Bear literally. I reminded myself of the reason I was on this bus. To protect Bear. No, I could not drag him back into the danger zone.

The large tires of the bus rolled over the gravel and into the parking lot of a bunch of small convenience stores. People moved to the exit, and my whole body felt as if it was about to break down from fear. Once everyone got off, my eyes moved to the outside, scanning the space vigilantly.

“Are you going to get out and get some fresh air?” the bus driver asked. “This will be your last chance to go to the public toilet unless you want to go to the toilet that’s at the back of the bus, and that’s not the best. I wouldn’t advise it. The door doesn’t shut properly, among other things.” The driver stretched his arms out as if he was on monkey bars in the door. “Nice shops here too. You can pick up some trinkets before you get out at Cutover. That’s your stop right?”

“Yes,” I answered in a mild voice.

The driver regarded me with a longer look as I unraveled myself from the seat and peeped out once again. “You might regret it if you don’t get out now. Time’s ticking. Go ahead, go take a look,” he coaxed.

“I will thank you.” I took the invitation and grabbed my purse, sliding it in the pocket of my hoodie as I walked over to the inviting set of shops. It appeared to be a little arcade and like the driver said, a good place to stock up on snacks. My hoodie stayed on. I didn’t want anyone to see me regardless of whether it looked like the coast was clear. I was close to ninety-percent sure that Rocky knew I was on the bus out of Holbeck as he’d become eerily obsessed with tracking me like a wild animal.

I found a restroom at one of the cafes. Then I purchased a bag of chips, water, and some gummy bears and hurried back onto the bus, holding my breath. I couldn’t help myself. I looked at my phone and sure enough there were text messages galore from Bear.

Delphia. Please tell me where you are. I can help you.

I wouldn’t have gotten hurt. You needed to trust that.

Talk to me, Delphia.

I felt the tears squeeze out from my eyes as I opened my bag of chips, ready to cry into them as well. In fact, one of my tears dropped into them and I ate the tear-soaked chip, wishing for another life to magically appear in front of me.

A few minutes later as we took off, the bus patrons found their seats. I rubber necked out the window to see if Rocky was anywhere. There weren’t obvious signs of him, but it didn’t stop me from looking.

The bus driver whistled as the bus lurched forward. “See there, you got yourself some snacks and stretched your legs. Not too bad a town, Arver. Wait till Cutover. You’ll enjoy it there. How long are you staying?”

“I don’t know, indefinitely,” I expressed to him despondently.

“You sure don’t sound happy about it.”

“I’m fine about it. Thanks.” My tone was blunt enough to let him know to leave me the hell alone and that if he asked me another question, I was liable to explode.

I ate the rest of my chips in silence with headphones on to drown out the demons in my head. The vibration of my cell phone caused me to pick the headphones out of my ears as I answered a call I wanted to avoid.

“Delphia. Why are you doing this?” my mom queried anxiously. “Why wouldn’t you tell us that you’re going to up and leave? There must be something wrong. There has to be, otherwise you wouldn’t do this.”

“Mom, there is nothing wrong.” A bold-faced lie, but I didn’t know any other way with her. She would have a breakdown if she knew that Rocky was hunting me. “I need some me time. I’ll be back.” The last part was a potential lie too. I would have to sort some things out in Holbeck, but I didn’t know if I would be the one to do it. My brain and heart wasn’t in the right place for that.

“There has to be something,” she insisted. “You wouldn’t just up and leave like you have. It’s really out of character for you.”

“I get it, but I’m okay. I’m a little burned out with everything and thinking about Deon.” I knew this would get her to calm down.

Once I said my brother’s name, she sighed loudly through the phone. “Must be tough for you. I think about him every day. I want you to call me when you’re away. Call me tomorrow and check in. I want to know where you are. It’s for your safety. Don’t just leave like that without telling anybody where you are.” My mother’s scolding voice through the phone was coming from a place of love.

I knew that. I would be worried if my young daughter got up and left too, but it could be worse.

Bear could have been killed and no matter which way it went for me…

I would want to be D-E-A-D.