Page 43 of Rain After Fire (Balsam Ridge 3)

“Maybe not, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t true. You shouldn’t go around punishing every man in your life for what your father did to your mom. That’s just not fair. And you can’t bring that anger and rage into every argument you have. You have to just take a deep breath and, in that instant, remind yourself that this is not about your parents. Just fight for the issue at hand.”

“I don’t know if I’m capable,” I say, and in this moment, I realize how sad that statement is.

“Of course you can. When the right man comes along, you’ll find you’re capable of a lot more than you think,” Sara-Beth assures me as she smiles over at Corbin.

Crap.

“It’s hard, isn’t it?” Ansley asks me.

“What?”

“Loving someone and hating them at the same time,” she says.

I swallow, and tears form in the corners of my eyes. “Yeah.”

“Your parents were so young, Maxi. Amy Jo was fourteen when they married. How old was your father?” Leona asks.

“Sixteen.”

She leans her head toward the young boys who are splashing around in the pool. One is Taeli’s son, one is Langford’s son, and the others are boys I’ve seen around the campground.

“See them? They’re just children. But they are almost as old as your mother and father were when you were born. Babies with a baby. They had no clue what they were doing.”

I watch the kids and try to imagine them with a baby on their hip. It’s unimaginable.

“It’s a miracle she kept us alive. I guess I never thought about it before because when your little momma is your whole world, you don’t see her age,” I say.

“Of course not. The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world,” Leona consoles.

“And she was a good momma. She might have had a seventh-grade education, but I went into kindergarten, reading at a seventh-grade level. She didn’t have a lot to give, but what she had, she poured into me and my sister. She gave us the best she had.”

“Oh, we know that. Look at what a beautiful, smart woman you grew into,” Sara-Beth points out.

“I just wish she had lived long enough for me to give her all the things she had to do without. I wanted to make the rest of her life the best. I wasn’t finished making it up to her.”

“Making what up to her?” Leona asks.

“Giving up her life for mine.”

“Maxi, she didn’t expect that from you. The best gift a child can give their mother is to grow up and live a good and happy life. That’s all we need or want, and I know Amy Jo would be devastated to know that her choices are in any way holding you back from finding love.”

“I miss her.”

“Oh, honey, I know. My mother’s been gone for over two decades, and I still find myself reaching for the phone to call her. It’s a loss you never get over. But one day, you’ll be able to think of her, and that throbbing ache in your chest won’t be there. You’ll be able to remember her and smile. Time doesn’t heal the wound; it just scabs it over, so it’s not gaping any longer.”

“That sounds terrible, Mom. I know you’re trying to come off as comforting, but it’s not working,” Taeli says.

Ansley laughs, and wine comes out of her nose, which throws her into a coughing fit. We all start laughing as Taeli pounds her on the back.

Sara-Beth grabs my hand. “Everything is about timing. Nature has seasons. The body has a pulse and heartbeat. A woman’s body has a rhythm. Birth has rhythm. God has a timing for everything. You came to Balsam Ridge at the precise moment you needed it and it needed you.”

Timing is everything? Oh no, please don’t get too attached to me.

Corbin walks over and places his hands on my shoulders. I look up at him.

“Are you okay?” he asks.

“Yeah.”

---