Page 86 of Scarred (Russian Sinners 2)

I didn’t feel fear at hearing him say those words. I would be a hypocrite if I thought my father deserved anything better than Malcome did. The things he had done to my mother should have had him permanently put away. He deserved to be punished, and I wouldn’t mind pulling the trigger myself. That was the part that scared me the most. I should never want to pull a trigger on any human being, or end their life… especially not my father. But the things he had done to my mother were despicable.

“Did I say something?” I wasn’t sure if I wanted to know. I observed Nikolai for any sign whether I said something of significance but he was a hard person to read.

Chapter Thirty-Three

Nikolai

It killed me seeing Olivia thrash in her sleep, her body shivering with sweat and fear. She bit her lip so hard, it bled. Those nightmares were shaking her to the core and I wanted to extinguish them. I just didn’t know how. Initially, I worried she was plagued by the events she witnessed this morning but was quickly relieved of those fears in the worst way possible.

She kept muttering in her sleep. At first, I couldn’t distinguish her words, till wounded words came out of her lips asking her father to stop, to stop her wedding to Malcome.

What did her fucking father do?I wondered.

There was no doubt she had suffered under her father’s care. If you could even call it care! Even Ilya, who I never saw frazzled in all our years together, looked perturbed by seeing Olivia’s body shake.

She asked me if she said something. She was worried about revealing too much. I wanted her to tell me everything so I could help her. I wanted to stop her suffering.

“You mentioned your father,” I ended up answering vaguely.

She exhaled tiredly. It was time she let go of her ghosts. “I see,” she answered in a low voice.

I put the car into drive and sped out of the airport.

Thinking it through for several minutes, I finally asked, “What did your father do to you?”

She stared out the window, remaining silent, and I thought for a minute she wouldn’t answer.

“My father is-” she paused as if searching for a word that wouldn’t be too damning, “-cruel. When he couldn’t control his family, he’d resort to violence and beating us into submission. Oliver was getting increasingly stronger, so he started fighting back. It was one of the reasons he joined the military. So he’d avoid killing him.”

“And you and your mother?” I knew she hoped I wouldn’t continue my line of questioning. For all her strength, she wasn’t very good at hiding her feelings.

“He tamed… actually, a better word here would bebrokemy mother when we were children. She is broken around him.” Her voice was low and sad. “I hate seeing my mother like that. I want her to age gracefully and happy; the way she deserves, you know?”

I nodded. I could understand that. She cared about her mother greatly.

“And you?” I asked. I wanted to know what happened, and wouldn’t be deterred from my line of questioning.

A deep sigh left her lips. “My father had a hard time controlling me. And he hated that.” She glanced out the window, watching the fields passing by in the blur. “So he used my mother as his weapon when beating didn’t work.”

I tightened my grip on the wheel, my knuckles turning white. Her father would get a taste of his own medicine very soon. I would ensure it.

“What happened in your nightmare?” I tried hard to control my voice but I couldn’t conceal fury underneath my tone. I didn’t want her to think I was furious with anyone but her father.

“Six months ago, I left Malcom’s place barely holding the pieces of myself together.” She kept her tone detached, but it didn’t escape my notice of the shiver that ran through her body. She wrapped her arms around herself, as if she was trying to protect herself from the memory. “The next day, I told my father I wasn’t going to marry him. He-” She pulled her hand through her hair, a fleeting emotion crossing her face. I wondered whether it was remembrance of the pain by her father or what she endured under Malcome that had her shaken up. It didn’t matter because I would make both of them pay. “He slammed me against the wall, and I fell down two flights of marble stairs. His temper so far gone he didn’t stop there.” I took a deep breath, controlling my rage. Olivia didn’t need my rage right now. Her breathing was slightly labored, the pulse on her neck visibly faster. She laid her hand on her chest, as if trying to calm her erratic heartbeat just thinking about it. “My mother stopped him, but I passed out. Whatever happened, my mom convinced him to allow me to take my summer vacation with the girls to get myself together or she’d report him to the doctors. They were suspecting domestic abuse already.”

“It would have been a better option,” I gritted through my teeth. Olivia should have never endured such abuse. Neither should have her mother but Olivia was a bigger innocent in this. She didn’t have any say in who her father was.

“Yes, probably,” she agreed. “She begged me to run away during the trip and not come back. But I couldn’t leave her. He’d hurt her worse than he already had. She couldn’t handle more of it, and she shouldn’t have to bear it.”

I took her hand in mine and squeezed it gently.

“I will never let anyone hurt you again, I promise. Both you and your mom will be under my protection for as long as I live.” And I meant to uphold that promise. Anyone that got close to her or even thought about hurting her would pay with their life. “And I am sorry you had to see my violence this morning.”

Her blue gaze met my eyes, and her hand cupped my cheek, her thumb gently rubbing over the scar that marked my face.

“Don’t apologize for keeping us safe,” she murmured softly. “I wouldn’t have you any other way.”

And there it was. Her whole acceptance of what I was, again and again.

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