Page 96 of Caught A Vibe

My cat’s annoyed cry breaks my train of thought and I pick her up for a comforting hug, only to have the ungrateful demon spawn scratch me and leap from my arms onto the couch. She curls up in Dash’s spot and glares. I can feel her judging my life choices from across the room.

I wash the scratches in the sink, but I don’t scold her. If I was her, I’d be mad at me too.

Dammit. I miss him. Everything feels gray without him. And it’s all my fault.

It’s been over a week, and he’s disappeared completely. No phone calls, no texts, no “hey can I come by and pick up the charging cord I forgot” voicemails. I don’t even know where he went. I was so angry, I didn’t ask.

I need a plan to fix this, but I also recently got my ass handed to me for overplanning things, so I’m stuck. But I’ve never been one to let challenges slow me down.

I’ve done all I can for my company. We worked hard this week, and I stayed out of their way. Well, I tried. Baby steps.

My team is working the plan. We can carry on through the end of the month, and if we survive, we survive. If we don’t, we don’t. My friends were right. I have to let them do what I hired them to do. After all, I will have done what I set out to do. I’ll have gotten my product into the hands of people who deserve excellent orgasms. And I can take the lessons I’ve learned into my next venture.

Now it’s the weekend again. Since I’m no longer hiding in busyness, Dash’s absence is intolerable.

I cannot accept this empty apartment and broken heart. I have to try. I pick up the phone and call him, no plan, no practiced lines. I’m just going to pour my heart out and hope he forgives me.

I get sent straight to voicemail.

“Hi, Dash. It’s me. Penny. Um, I was hoping we could talk. Call me back.”

That night I try again, worried I haven’t heard from him. Straight to voicemail once again. Still unwilling to bare my soul to a machine, I stumble through another message.

“Dash, it’s Penny. I’m really sorry. I…can you please call me back? I need to talk to you.”

By noon the next day, I am frantic. I’ve lost track of how many messages I’ve left on his phone. He’s never not responded before. And this doesn’t feel like something I can do over email. He has disappeared and my brain fills in the blanks with worst-case scenarios.

Where did he go? What if he’s sick? What if he caught Covid because I kicked him out of our safe apartment? What if he’s so sick he can’t answer the phone?

I remember how sick I was, and how no one would have known if he hadn’t been there. I would have starved, unable to care for myself. What if he’s in a hotel somewhere so sick he can’t move? I have to find him. I have to.

Losing Dash is not a failure I’ll learn from. It’s a failure that will break me if anything has happened to him.

My heart flutters in my chest, matching my energy as I fly around my apartment, trying to think through my fear.

In my panic, I call XPTech and asked to be transferred to his line. They inform me he no longer works there. The pit in my stomach widens to a chasm, and I wish I could fall through it and disappear. Did I cost him his job too?Fuck!

I log in to my LinkedUp account and catch my first break. He hasn’t blocked me yet, but he’s also listed himself as a freelancer again.Damn.

I feel lower than low now. He’s not going to want to talk to me.

But my concern for his safety pushes me on. He can accept my apology or not, but I need to know he’s okay. I cannot even think of a world that doesn’t have Dash. Each minute that passes, my terror grows. I click through his links looking for the friend in LA he mentioned and luckily there’s only one Rishi.

Pushing aside that little voice that is insisting this isn’t an ethical use of the site, I send Rishi a message asking for any information on where to find Dash.

When his response comes back, I’m not surprised at the undertones of animosity couched in professional language.

Subject: Re: Do you know where Dash is?

From: [email protected]

May I ask the nature of this inquiry? Why do you need to know his physical location?

-Rishi Ravinder

he/him

Subject: Re: Re: Do you know where Dash is?

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