Page 20 of How Good It Was (Excess All Areas 3)

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“Who are you looking at?” Matt shouted two days later, joining Luke at the balcony of the club they’d ended up in after recording a live music slot for a popular Friday evening TV show.

“Watching Alex.” He tipped his head to where Alex was talking to an attractive couple he’d seen earlier, noticing Alex had wrapped his hand around the woman’s wrist, and the man’s. Luke tipped his chin in their direction. “Want to take bets on which one he is going home with?”

Matt looked over and grinned. “Both.”

“Greedy fucker,” Luke huffed.

Perhaps it was because Willow had told him he would have to stop all that stuff he did that he craved another line of coke. Or maybe it was simply the copious amount of alcohol he’d already drunk. But the pounding in his head matched the drum and bass of the club, and he needed a flood of dopamine.

He felt shitty leaving her alone. Felt even worse that he’d not introduced her to his sister only a few floors away in the same building. But he’d not been ready to make everything public knowledge.

Yet.

“Figured you’d be in a better mood after the arrival of Willow. She’s a cute thing.”

Luke sighed and rubbed his finger over his lip before taking another gulp on his beer. “Yeah, she’s fun,” he said, vaguely. And pretty. It was like his dick and his brain were playing ping-pong. His dick thought she was sexy as fuck. His brain had concluded she was a ball and chain there to take his freedom. The ball getting smacked between the two every five minutes.

“She staying at your place?” Matt asked.

“For now, yeah.” He finished the rest of the beer and debated getting another. He wondered how the two of them living together would work in the longer term. Being around her was half terror, half arousal. The way her lips always looked so fucking pink and juicy that all he could think about was how they’d looked wrapped around his cock in Detroit. When she’d listened to his instructions on how he liked it so thoroughly, he’d had to throw her on the bed before she made him come in her mouth in less than sixty seconds.

Matt took a sip of his beer. “Do you and her have a thing going on?”

Luke raised his eyebrow. While he had found it easier of late to deal with the fact Matt had fallen for Izabel, Luke’s sister, he still wasn’t ready to discuss his life with him right now.

“She’s just a bit of fun.” The lie fell from his mouth too easily, and he hated it. Lying didn’t sit well in his gut. Matt and Izabel had lied to him for months. It wasn’t who he was.

“As long as Willow knows the score. What’s she over here for, anyway?” Matt asked.

“Work,” Luke answered. “Something to do with her social media platforms.” This time, it wasn’t a blatant lie. She was over here to save her career. But he wasn’t ready to tell Matt what was going on.

Yet.

The ticking of the clock had never sounded louder than that of a pending child. Christ. What kind of a father would he be? Half-cut on a Tuesday in a nightclub, wishing he was Alex.

Although, Willow would be taking the baby back to the States with her once the year was up ... if he agreed.

Shouldn’t becoming a parent be a joy? Something to look forward to? Heck, his mum had told him how hard she and his dad had tried to have kids. Years it had taken them. Which was funny because she’d fucked off to Brighton with his dad’s best mate, leaving his sister, Izabel, in his care—still a fucking teen himself.

His head was going to explode.

Everything was all tied up together. Responsibilities he didn’t want now because of responsibilities he’d been given by the very people who should have been responsible for him.

And, wow, how pathetic was he, blaming his dead dad and lonely mum.

Fuck, how useless was he, unable to shake the feeling of doom.

Matt turned to face him, leaning against the railing. “I haven’t told Izabel she’s here. It’s your business. But it’s weird you’re keeping it a secret from her and the rest of the band. And a dick move to leave her there alone when Iz, Cerys, Chaya, and Zoe are out for dinner tonight and would have totally taken her with them. You want to tell me what’s really going on?”

Luke shook his head. “None of your business, really.”

“I don’t understand why you don’t trust me. We’ve been best friends for a really long time.”

“Pity you forgot that when you fucked my sister, eh?” Deflection felt like a fair strategy.

Matt looked down at the bubblegum-stained floor for a moment before meeting his eye. “Take your best shot at me, I don’t care. Yeah, I fuck her, you dick. And I make love to her. And I cook breakfast with her. And write songs about her. Because I love her with every bit of my being. And when you aren’t being an arsehole, I appreciate that you’ve found some kind of peace with me and her.”

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