Page 50 of Next Time I Fall (Excess All Areas 2)

“Okay. Ilovedbeing in the studio. I’d taken some modules as part of my degree, but I’d avoided it because I really didn’t want to follow in Jimmy’s footsteps. I didn’t want those comparisons. And I was worried it was some kind of weird Daddy issue, so I fought it. Turns out I love it. And I happen to be good at it. I went to college, gained more skills I need, and went to the bank for a loan to set up a studio of my own and got turned down.”

Disappointment laced her words. “Did they say why?”

“They felt I didn’t have enough practical experience. I figured if I was going to fix that, having one of the greatest music producers alive give me a reference might be a good start. Even if the reference would only leapfrog me into a better full-time job. And with that, I could apply again. But I don’t even know where Jimmy’s head is at. I just told him I needed some work experience, but I ...”

Cerys glanced over to the curtained window.

“But I what?”

“I’m starting to wish he’d just see me, Jase. Like, really see me. And it sounds pathetic when I say it out loud, and I’m too old to need my dad.”

The words pricked something raw inside. He’d lost his dad at six and knew something of the pain of not having a father. Hell, even his mum had abandoned him. That hole you never admitted to. The one that made you feel as though no one on the planet really wanted you. When it was parents’ evening, or your footie match, and you saw everyone else looking happy with their folks.

Jase wished he could give her that gift of Jimmy taking notice. Because when she saw him, saw beneath his anger to who he was, she gave him a foundation and strength.

“I’m sorry, for that day in the studio when I called you Baby Bexter. You were right to call me out. From what I’ve seen of Jimmy, I’m guessing he probably doesn’t want to show you any nepotism and has gone too far in making his point. And I’m sure he sees how good you are. How can he not?”

“Well, I only came out here for three months. I’m technically violating my tourist visa. So, we don’t have much time to figure it out. Then, I go home.”

Fuck.

He hadn’t thought about that. Her being here, him being back in the UK.

But what had his nan said? Listen. Tenderness. He reached for her hand. “I don’t know much, but I do know a lot about barging through a door and making space for yourself until all eyes are on you. I can help you do that.”

“What do you mean?”

“We need a plan.”

“For what?”

“Operation get Cerys the best reference and job ever. We start with your dad. And how you stop asking for permission to do everything and just start showing up. What’s he going to do? Kick you out of the control room?”

“He might.”

“And if he does, so what? You aren’t getting what you need from him now, so try something different.”

“Like what?”

“I’ll give you one, for a start. Hit up everyone you know and ask them for help. Ask me.”

“Ask you what?”

Jase pitched his voice to hers. “Hey, Jase. I have this dream to open a recording studio, and to do that, I need two things. Some great references and better experience than I have. Could you help me with either of those things, please?”

Cerys rolled her eyes. “Jase.”

“I’m serious.”

“Fine. Hey, Jase. I have this dream to open a recording studio, and to do that, I need two things. Some great references and better experience than I have. Could you help me with either of those things, please?”

“Why, Cerys. I’m so glad you thought to ask me. Of course I can help. Easiest reference ever. I’ll mention how we’re anxious to start work in the studio you are looking to build, which, at some point in time, I assume we will be given a discount for our troubles.”

Cerys laughed. “How utterly selfless of you. But, done. Continue.”

“And I’ll talk to the band about you potentially helping us out as our assistant sound engineer when we go on tour, if that is something that would help if you still need work then.”

Her fingers linked with his. “You’d do all that?”

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