Page 75 of The Star

She turns on her heel, going back through the door and slamming it shut behind her.

Carson lets go of me, walking to the wall and sliding down until his ass hits the floor and his face falls into his hands.

I stand there staring at him, completely mind-fucked and overwhelmed. “What the fuck?”

He shakes his head, keeping it in his hands. “What the fuck is right.”

I walk to him, dropping down in front of him and pulling his hands from his face to thread my fingers between his. “What are we going to do?”

He laughs humorlessly, dropping his head back against the wall. “About which part? The fact your dad is a piece of shit, or the fact we’re now being blackmailed by my girlfriend so I keep dating her?”

I snort. “Either. Both.”

He shakes his head, connecting his gaze with mine. “Tonight, we’re not going to do anything. I’m not going to ruin this day for my mom. Tomorrow, we’ll figure it all out.”

I can’t help but feel annoyed and irritated by his answer, no matter how logical he’s being. “You don’t think your mom deserves to know?! And what, are you just going to just pretend everything is fine with the wicked witch of the cheer squad? Fuck her in your hotel room?”

“Of course, I’m not going to fuck her, Logan. I’m going to slap a smile on my face, let this party run its course, then get blackout drunk in my hotel room with my friends to ease the fucking burning rage inside of me. Yes, my mom deserves to know about your dad, but not tonight. Let her fucking have this, Logan, please. She deserves to have a slice of happiness before we set it all on fire.”

I press my face to his shoulder, sighing. “Fine.”

He puts a hand on my face, so I lift up to look at him. “I’m sorry.”

I shake my head. “Don’t. Just… don’t.”

He nods, understanding my words and reading the exhaustion in my tone. He rubs his thumbs across my cheeks. “You have mascara all over your face.”

I laugh. “Yeah.”

He sighs. “Are you going to come back to the party?”

Shaking my head, I suck a breath in and then blow it out slowly. “No, I don’t think I want to face my dad or see you with Cassidy, so I think I’ll just head up to my room.”

He nods, kissing me softly on the lips. “I promise I’ll fix this.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Carson,” I breathe against his lips, then stand up and leave the room without another glance at him.

thirty-five

LOGAN

Ibite my lip to stop the tears as I walk to the elevator, telling myself I can wait until I get into my hotel room to break down. I’m thankful we have another night here, because I don’t think I would be able to get myself home tonight. I feel exhausted deep in my bones.

Taking the elevator up to my floor, I walk numbly to my room and unlock the door with my key card.

My vision starts to blur as it fills with tears, so as my door slams behind me, I start stripping. I kick off my shoes, then rip the comb from my hair and throw it across the room. Reaching around to my back, I unzip my dress, but I’m bombarded with thoughts of Carson sliding my zipper down last night. I can’t hold it in anymore, and I sob, a loud and heavy sound that makes my chest cave. I slide out of my dress, leaving it lying on the floor as I head for the bathroom.

I slip my panties down my legs, then unclip my bra and throw it on the floor as well. Stepping into the shower, I turn the water on and stand under the freezing cold spray as it starts to heat up. My body shakes with sobs, but I keep moving. As the water turns molten, I wash my hair and then my body, letting cries shake through my system the whole time.

Scrubbing my face, I wash away all the expensive makeup that was applied to my skin just hours before.

I wash my face one more time when I’m finally breathing steady and only a few tears slip from my eyes, and when I’m completely cried out, I turn the water off and slip from the shower.

Wrapping a towel around my body, I dry my hair with another as I stare at myself through the foggy mirror. I shake my head at myself as I go through the entire day in my head. When I woke up this morning, my biggest problem was that I was angry with Carson over something that seems so irrelevant and stupid now that it actually pulls a laugh from my mouth as I start to dry my body.

Once I’m dry, I walk to my bed completely naked.

I flip the lights off as I reach the bed, and when the room is cloaked in blackness, I crawl under the blankets and curl myself into a ball.

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