Page 23 of Unforgivable

Lyri

I can't stop crying. Nothing new here, but this time I'm crying because of the pile of paper in my lap.

"Shh, gorgeous," Ezra is behind me, trying to hold me still because my body is shaking so badly that it's aggravating my injuries.

"S-s-she says that she loves me, r-right h-here!" I wail. I point to the spot on the paper that I remember seeing my mom's delicate handwriting curling into the familiar words. It's blurry, but I know what it says.

'I love you, my biggest.'

She always called me her biggest instead of her oldest. She was proud to have an eldest female instead of a male. It's not that common with wolves. All of her friends had males first.

When I was five, I got into a scrape with the firstborn son of one of her closest friends because he called me a 'shrimp.' When I got scolded for making him eat dirt, I told my mom, with all of the indignation of a five-year-old, that I was her biggest, so I was the best. It stuck.

I try to tell Ezra the story, but I'm not sure how much he understands over my blubbering.

"Why the fuck is she crying?" Thjis snaps, stalking into the room with irritation written all over him.

I show him the soggy papers in my lap.

"She got about a paragraph in," Ezra says teasingly.

I slap his arm, ineffectually, as he chuckles behind me.

"Female, you need to stop. You'll tear something loose," Thjis scolds. He kneels, pulling the blanket off of my legs.

I whine. I don't want him to check on me right now. It's so degrading to have this male always poking at me.

"Let me see, Lyri," he says more gently than usual.

"It's embarrassing," I hiccup. I'm not sure if I'm more embarrassed about crying, again, or having Thjis undress me whenever he wants.

"Yeah, but you're healing well," he says with satisfaction. "Stitches look great. All of the skin is holding together. How does this feel?" He presses on my lower abdomen.

"It still aches a little," I admit.

"But no sharp pain?" he asks, moving his hand around to different spots and pressing.

"No."

He offers me a rare smile. "Your legs?"

I feel my face frown. "Still suck."

His smile fades, too. "Yeah, that's going to take some time. The muscle has to both rebuild and strengthen, and the bone needs to heal."

"I have a broken bone?"

He blinks at me. "Yeah, baby. The swelling and pain on your right side make me think you have a fracture there, maybe of the femoral neck. Your left hip dislocated at the socket. The fracture is what I'm worried about the most. It's a nasty injury that will probably affect you forever."

"Oh," I offer lamely. I don't know where the femoral neck is, but it sounds bad. Forever? I don't live in the forever, anymore. I can only live in the now.

"I don't have an x-ray machine here, obviously, so it's just a guess."

"OK," I whisper. I look down at my lap as Thjis covers me back up. "Hey, where did my letter go?" I look around frantically.

"Ezra took it."

"That's mine!" I snap at Thjis. "Tell him to bring it back right now! Ezra!" I holler out.

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