Page 23 of Drawn To You

Shannon - Missed Call.

Shannon - ANSWER THE FUCKING PHONE.

Shannon - I’m so fucking done with your shit. Good luck getting me to put out anytime soon! I could have any guy I want, I don’t fucking need you.

Letting out a breath, I drop my phone into the sheets and stare up at the ceiling. I suppose this is what I get when I don’t answer my phone all night while she is pissed off and drunk. Though, it’s not my problem anymore. Good luck to her. I’m sure it’ll be fun trying to find someone that will be as big of a sucker as I’ve been the last couple of years to be at her beck and call.

It’s Abby I worry about. If Shannon realizes that there is something going on between us, it won’t take long before Shannon’s cornering her, demanding retribution. My gaze lingers on the ceiling, desperately wishing I could sleep another few hours. I stayed up late watching movies with the boys before putting them to bed and spent the rest of the night cleaning the trashed apartment.

I’m not going to lie, I also laid awake for most of the night, unable to stop picturing the way Abby had looked as she moved up and down on my hard shaft, unable to stop imagining just how good it would feel to have her mouth around my cock and wondering what was rushing through her head as I fucked her.

Shit, I know I shouldn’t go there. It’s dangerous territory, I should try and leave emotions out of this for both of our sake. As much as I’m coming to care for Abby, I don’t want her getting too attached because I can’t offer her anything permanent. I’m too fucked up and I know I should have never touched her, but I couldn’t stop myself. I know I’m playing with fire here and I can only hope that neither one of us gets burned by it. Abby deserves better. I’m just too selfish to walk away and I know I will take anything she is willing to give me.

I hate what I’ve become. What Shannon’s betrayal has made of me. But I’d rather be the Monster in the story than ever let myself be someone’s prey again. I will not ever give anyone that kind of power over me again! I just don’t know how far I’m willing to go to protect myself and deep down that scares me.

Without thinking, my gaze falls to my phone and the picture of Abby on my screen. I’ve taken to stalking her social media and just seeing her profile picture, looking like some kind of wet dream, makes it hard to focus. Ha. Maybe if Shannon wasn’t cheating on me and we had a normal sex life, I wouldn’t be so starved for this. I’m so hungry for it that it scares me. I’m going to get myself in trouble, trouble I can’t afford.

Beeeeep. “Fucking hell.” My hand grips my phone tighter, raising it above my head to spy the screen better. I immediately swipe the new message away and my gaze settles on the time across the screen. 7:42 am. Fury boils through me. Can this morning seriously get any worse?

Shannon: I’m on my way home. We need to talk.

The last thing I want to do is fucking talk to Shannon. I’m so done with this bullshit. Letting out a sigh, I filter through my options. Stay and fight with Shannon again like a fucking loser or take off and piss her off even more. Shit. On one hand, if I don’t at least try and keep things cool between Shannon and me she will make my life a living hell. On the other hand, Fuck her!

Fuck it. Call me a sucker for punishment. I don’t want to put up with her bullshit today. If she wants to give me a hard time about my leaving, then so be it. I’m done being her whipping post.

Me: I won’t be home. Taking the boys to my Mom’s for a bit. Will be back later.

I get the boys ready and we take off before Shannon made it home. Thank God for small miracles…

* * *

It’s well after dark when I make it home with the boys. Both of them passed out in the car on the ride home so I carry them both in and put them in their beds before I raid the fridge for something to eat.

Seeing my Mom today was nice, even if she did make a few negative comments about Shannon. Usually, it’d bug me, but I didn’t care as much as I used to but I did remind her to watch what she says about the boy’s Mom in front of them. As much as I have problems with her myself I don’t want anyone bad-mouthing her in front of them because I know it will only hurt them.

Moving to the open doorway of our bedroom, I find Shannon perched on the end of our bed, anger flooding her heated stare, watching me as though she knows I’m already done. Reaching up, I grip the frame of the door and stare back at her, letting her see the defeat that’s been plaguing me and hating how I know she is going to use it against me.

“Where the fuck have you been?” Shannon stands and moves across the room, getting closer with every step until she’s standing right before me, her eyes glaring daggers up at me. “I’ve been sitting here waiting for you all day,” she tells me.

My anger towards her storms through me, knowing that everything I thought I knew about her was a lie and that the person I loved never even existed is a complete mind fuck. I loved her with my whole heart before I realized it was all a delusion. If anything, she needs to fuck off out of here because every moment alone with her only screws with me more.

I need to push her away once and for all. But I can’t afford to lose everything, and that’s exactly what’s going to happen if I make the wrong move. I have my boys to think about, a job to get to in the morning, and bills to pay, and none of that is going to happen if I make a wrong move with Shannon now. Shannon shouldn’t even matter to me after her betrayal, but she holds all the cards so I’m forced to play my part for the time being.

I’m in too fucking deep with her. “I was at my Mom’s, didn’t you get my message?” I question, my tone filled with venom. “You were the one out all night with another guy, and you’re mad that I wasn’t sitting at home waiting for you?” She flinches at my tone, her stare hardening. “Oh, that’s rich, Joshua! Where were you last weekend, and remind me again who were you with,hmm?” she throws back at me. “I don’t complain when you hang out with your “friends” and you give me this bullshit attitude when I hang out with mine? How dare you!” she screeches.

“I never wanted to hang out with other women in the first place, you set that into motion and you know it, Shannon. So where do you get off throwing that in my face now? I only ever wanted and needed my wife and kids, that was enough for me, but I was never enough for you, was I Shannon? So let’s stop pretending that this marriage isn’t already over.” I spit back at her and she actually looked stunned.

She swallows hard, her stare taking on a rage of its own. “Cut the attitude,” she demands. “You’re acting like a fucking idiot all because … what? Because I went out last night with my friend who happens to be male? What’s the big deal, do you really not trust me?” she demanded and I couldn’t help but scoff at her audacity.

“No, I don’t trust you and I think we both know it’s over between us, Shannon,” there, I finally said it. By the look on Shannon’s face, I might as well have thrown a grenade at her. Bile rises in my chest as she steps forward and presses her body against mine, her hands roaming over my chest and arms as her lips press against my neck. The feel of her tongue moving over my skin makes me want to hurl, but I don’t stop her. “How could you say that to me, babe? Don’t you love me?” she pleaded. “What about the boys? How can you do this to us?” she whined and it was like a punch to the gut. She knew right where my weaknesses were and how to play them against me.

Shannon’s fingers grip the hem of my shirt, raising it up over my head and tossing it to the side before she greedily roams her hands over my bare chest, trailing them down my abs and rubbing them over the front side of my pants and stroking my cock. She groans, her lips still moving against my neck, and involuntarily my dick hardens at her unwanted touch.

I figure it’d be a dick move to tell her that she’s not doing it for me, but that the sweet redhead I can’t stop thinking about is what’s got me on edge. Shannon pulls her lips free and tries to kiss me, but I shake my head, taking her shoulder and pushing her away a step. Meeting her cautious stare, I lower my voice, letting her know just how serious I am. “We’re not doing this.” “What? No,” she rushes out, gripping onto my biceps and pulling me back to her. “We just need some quality time together. Marriage has its ups and downs and we are just going through a rough patch. Let me take care of you.” she cooed and irritation burned through my veins. I take a step back, putting space between us. “Shannon, it ain’t gonna happen. I’m sorry, I’m just not feeling it after everything.”

“This is because of Little Miss Goody Two Shoes, isn’t it?” she questions, watching me a little too carefully. “I get it. You’ve been lonely and you like her and want to fuck her, is that it?” “This has got nothing to do with her.” Shannon rolls her eyes. “I’m not blind Joshua for fuck’s sake. Do you not think that I noticed what’s been going on between you two? Did you think I failed to notice she got hold of my husband’s attention? Do you know what I think Joshua? I think you have a hard-on for her.”

She walks toward me, her hand dropping to my shoulder and slowly brushed her fingertips across my skin. “She’s nothing, Joshua. Just some meek, timid bitch from HB. Fuck her, do whatever you have to do to get her out of your system, and when you’re ready for someone more your speed, I’ll be right at home where you know where to find me.” I stare at her in disbelief. Who is this woman? What did I ever see in her?