Page 3 of Beautiful Disaster

I burst out laughing. “You? Listen to my show?” This man was just full of surprises.

“Yeah, it’s just fluff with no substance. How are you able to get these listeners feeding them nothing but bullshit?” Wow! Did he totally just ask me that? What a douchebag!

“I will not justify that dickheaded question with an answer. I gather you’re single?” I was trying to get the one up on him, matching my bitter tongue with his nasty attitude. Hardin nodded his head to my question.

“Single and perfectly fine with it. Although, admittedly, I have no problem attracting women, I just-um, have a fear of commitment. Which suits me just fine.” The air of smugness lingered.

Hardin had an answer for every question, and I’m failing this test at stumping him. “Another question, what are your ratings like?”

“Middling, since I follow the Queen of Hearts and haven’t found the magic to keep her listeners.” Oh, poor man, it must be tough getting people excited about financial advice. I stood up and sat on the edge of his desk. “Will you please take your seat?” He was squirming, which only escalated when I leaned in closer to him.

“No, I’m quite comfortable here. So, Hardin, how can we bring your ratings up?” A deal was spurning in my head.

“You can’t.” He let out a defeated exhale. “The boss is giving me a month to bring my numbers up or they will pull my show. I mean, I will still keep my job as a Financial Analyst.”

“It’s interesting, everyone tells me you’re my competition. You’re always number two to my number one. I think it’s your voice that is keeping listeners. How does one make talk about money exciting? They don’t, unless you bring in guests to your show. Have you thought of that?” He sat there, completely dumbfounded. “It’s just a suggestion. But surely you jest, why would I give you ideas on how to knock me off my pedestal?”

“Do you want to have dinner with me tonight after work?”

I laughed at his proposal. “Are you asking me on a date?”

“Um, no. It’s almost time for me to quit for the day. I-uh- wanted to talk to you more about investing your money. Business, not a date. Also, you piqued my interest in changing my show.”

I jumped off the desk and headed toward the door. “I need to decline your invitation, Hardin. It’s my weekend, and I have every intention of taking my Ducky for a ride out to Boulder City. I never miss their Western Days.” I know I said too much when I heard him humming.

“You have a bike?”

I raised my brows, “Yes, Ducky is my Ducati Monster. I—um, also own a HarleyDavidson Sportster. Are you off on Saturday?” He nodded. “Do you own a bike?”

“Yes! A Harley-Davidson Softail Deluxe, which I have yet to spread its legs—I mean, stretch its legs.” I heard the comment the first time, yet I would not call him on it. At least we were getting somewhere, finding we had something in common.

“Saturday, nine in the morning, you have my address on my portfolio. And my number. I will see you then.” I rushed over to the elevators. Once inside, I exhaled the breath I was holding, wondering if this Saturday was going to be dreadful or if Hardin will be the next man in line to cast me aside after the fifth date or text.

Three

Hardin Mills

***Saturday Morning***

Even though Desiree said to meet at nine in the morning, we met a bit earlier to have a large breakfast at Cracker Barrel. This was not my choice, since I hate crowded places. I wanted to talk business, but learned more about her likes, her pet peeves, and her Siamese Cats. The business part of the conversation was a failure, as she was adamant she didn’t want to start a business. In addition, she was on the fence about investing any of her savings. I had to drop it, since she was not so easy to persuade.

“Do you think cats are a proper replacement for a boyfriend?” I know my question was inappropriate, seeing the wide-eyed look in her deep brown eyes. Laughing, I rephrased it, “I meant as far as company not sexual, which seems to be where your mind wanders.”

Desiree’s laugh was soft with the same purr as her radio voice. The smile in her eyes was permanent, and I wondered if this woman was ever cranky. It was interesting to me that someone who pride themselves as an expert on love was single and from what she told me had no luck with keeping a relationship.

“My cats have never broken my heart, Hardin.” There was sadness in her face as she dug into her biscuits and gravy. Covering her mouth, she continued with a glimmer in her eyes. “Honestly, I think people are slowly learning what a fraud I am. You know what I would give to have the gift of figuring out people's perfect mate-maybe I’d be more convincing.”

This was a far-fetched idea, although I knew for sure she was being cheeky, never once did I consider she considered herself a fraud, just hosting a show that served no purpose in this world, even if it made people happy and hopeful.

I had always assumed Desiree King was so full of herself that she had no time for us little people. After the last couple of days, I had learned she was very humble, but not only that, she lacked self-confidence in what she was advising daily. “I wish I could tell a person their bank accounts will have a million dollars. With a snap of my fingers, I replenish their bank accounts.”

“We’ve both got the same issues, though different. We have the desire to be people pleasers,” she sighed, “and we’re failing. Let’s make a deal, as of right now.”

I waited until the server refilled my empty coffee cup before I inquired about this deal Desiree was about to offer. “What deal are you talking about?”

“I will help you raise your ratings on the show—you may not like the idea so much. However, if we fake a relationship and word gets out that you’re dating the Queen of Hearts, you’ll get more listeners. Especially if they can see that you’re as handsome as that amazing voice of yours.” It was a strange request. To engage in a non-committal, non-sexual relationship with this stunning woman sitting across from me. Admittedly, I was more intrigued than anything, even if it was a farce. A lot of celebrities engage in fake relationships when a new movie is premiering. It could work for radio show hosts, right?

“Desiree, as much as I hate to be party to this ridiculous idea,” I reached across the table, shaking her hand. “You have a deal.”

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