Page 6 of Lost Passions (Timeless Affection)

I crumble, emotionally and literally. My knees go first, my fingers failing in their grip on his arms. What have I done? If not for the guard who has come to get me again, I’d pool to the floor.

As it is, I allow him to move me away from James where I’m met by the stares of what feels like a hundred strangers. There are no sympathetic eyes to ease my anxiety or a friendly shoulder to lay my head on. I see out of the corner of my eye the blonde woman from the hallway sitting in the corner surrounded by her group of girls. She’s watching me sharply, an ugly frown on her face. As I’m being led away, I realize I do recognize one other person besides James, Richard, one of James’ childhood friends. He stands behind the crowd, blending into the shadows. I had met him a few times during James and I’s courtship. He shows no sign that he recognizes me.

The guard is silent next to me as he marches me from the room. I hope that I haven’t gotten him in trouble since he was the one who allowed me into the room to see James in the first place. I hang my head. My company is my own and I tunnel into myself as my mind drifts, farther and farther away into the depths of my troubled mind.

I recoil, as does everyone I’m sure, at James’ ferocious roar behind the now closed door and the following diatribe that’s lost as we get farther down the hall. Time is nowhere to be found. I have no awareness of anything around me as the entire walk is spent replaying what just happened while at the same time hoping James gives me a chance to explain.

I never meant to hurt him.

I’m jerked from my trance as a clang echoes around me, signaling that we’re at our destination.

The underground prison.

My stomach, which has been on shaky ground since I saw Windsor’s towers, rolls again. It’s a good thing I haven’t eaten since yesterday. I close my eyes as they well with tears. I don’t want to cry. It seems to be all that I do. I will the waterworks away, looking at my new place as the guard closes the cell door behind me and locks it.

I sit in the cold dark by myself. I start laughing a bit hysterically to myself as I think about the fact that ending up in the Windsor prison cells was one of my main fears the first time that I met James. How ironic that it’s where I ended up.

Chapter 3

Ilisten to the drip, drip, drip of water as it falls from the ceiling in the dank and moldy cell. There’s the smell of decay and rot all around me. It’s a miserable place and it fits my current mood perfectly.

I was foolish to think that my first interaction with James would have gone any differently. I can’t get the look on his face out of my mind, that mixture of fury and devastation.

I long for his touch. I long for the touch of all of my men. Gabriel would be calmly telling me that everything would be all right. Landon would have threatened to kill James for me. Will would have said something to make me laugh. And Liam. Liam would have told me I wasn’t alone, that he would always be there for me.

Maybe I had been a particularly horrific person and I somehow just hadn’t realized it in my first life. It was the only explanation I could think of at the moment of why my entire life read like a tragedy.

A tragedy with beautiful moments that had lit up my dark nights with light that surpassed even the stars, and the rest of the story filled with crippling despair.

One thing was clear, even though it had been years, as soon as I saw James again, I was that same girl, desperately in love with the prince she couldn't have.

I guess he didn't feel the same.

* * *

It seemsto me that the cell is haunted, and even though I had spent the majority of my life alone, I still hated it at the moment as the ghosts of my past whirled around me.

A door opening down the hall caught my attention. I peeked through the bars to see who it was. It was two of the guards that had been guarding the palace gates when I had first arrived.

"Well, what do we have here?" the blonde guard says lecherously.

A shiver of unease goes down my spine. They had seemed relatively normal by the light of day, but there was no light down here, only the flicker of a lighted torch on the wall. In the shadows, the guards looked sinister, men that I should be very afraid of.

"It looks like the cook wasn't right about your chances, was she?" the other guard says with a laugh.

I remain silent. They could tease me all they want. That certainly wouldn’t affect me. The memory of James's face when he saw me, however, would affect me forever.

"Cat got your tongue, pretty lady? Is a guardsman not enough to get you to spread your legs? You only would do it for a king?"

He pulls a key out of his pocket, presumably to my cell, and my dread intensifies. I had been in dangerous situations before obviously, there are certain centuries and places in the world where it was definitely not safe for a woman to be traveling on her own. And of course, I could never forget the fact that I saw firsthand what bad men can do when I lived with Clara.

But someone or something had always intervened before it got too far with me. Looking behind the guards, I could tell we were all alone down here with the exception of the other prisoners.

What are you doing?" I ask, panic present in my voice. The prison door slides open with a clang. The blonde guard walks in, fiddling with his pants to loosen them. My panic intensifies.

"Get out of here! The King will kill you for this," I order, trying to put some authority in my voice, although there’s little likelihood that James would even care at this point.

"I don't see anyone around here," he says as he slides his breaches down. I avert my eyes. I was still wearing the T-shirt and jeans that I had been wearing when I first arrived. No one had cared enough at the palace thus far to get me something else to wear and I was grateful I wasn't wearing a dress in the moment. It would be a little bit harder for him to get my clothes off in my jeans.

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