Page 10 of The Dark War

“Don’t know what you are talking about, little witch.”

Clara

“Come on, little one,” I said quietly as I tried to breastfeed Evelyn. It wasn’t as easy as mother made it out to be. Evelyn was having a terrible time, and finding out she was tongue-tied didn’t help either. Kane almost snapped at the doctor when they clipped the extra skin under her tongue to allow her to suckle properly.

It was taking all my strength to keep Kane calm. It wasn’t a joke when he said an alpha fiercely protects his family. It was for the best having Evelyn have the procedure done, the numbing medicine wouldn’t have worked on a werewolf, and she was one-hundred percent werewolf. Tiny little teeth buds were already sprouting in her mouth, like you would see with most tiny little puppy newborns. She was strong and fierce just like her father, a perfect ruler to inherit the throne one day. She was everything I wasn’t, and I was happy with that.

Ten pounds, ten whole pounds of baby, came out of my five-foot-four frame. Dr. Talbert said if I was a human, I would have ripped from top to bottom, causing me to be on bed rest for weeks. Luckily, Giana had a paw in this because otherwise, I would have been a mess of trouble.

Kane sat in the rocking chair beside me, watching me try to get the baby to latch. I swear I could see the lust in his eyes when I peeked at him, but he only would clear his throat to look over his laptop filled with endless emails and budgets.

Evelyn cried because she couldn’t draw my milk out quickly enough. It had been two days of her crying, driving me up the wall. I couldn’t understand why my milk wouldn’t come down fast enough until Naomi, Kane’s mother, began to help me.

“I had trouble with Kane too.” Naomi pulled the baby from me so I could adjust myself. There was no shame in the room. My breasts were exposed to the air, feeling the cool breeze to help ease the pain of Evelyn’s vacuum of a mouth. “I was so stressed—Kane being the firstborn, plus luna duties—that I couldn’t relax enough to let the milk flow. That tingling feeling in your breast should follow quickly after she begins eating, have you felt that?” I shook my hand shamefully, only to feel her hand grip mine.

“This is your first baby. It takes time for milk to come in. The first couple of days, the baby is small, and her tummy doesn’t need much. She’s just extra fussy because she is impatient like her father.” Glancing over to Kane, he pretended he didn’t hear, mumbling a curse under his breath. Chuckling, Naomi went to a food cart brought in.

“Drink this, it has fenugreek and blessed thistle. It will help your lactation. I can grab a small bottle for her if you wish to get her tummy full so you can sleep.”

“Will that disrupt me feeding her?” My voice trembled. I wanted nursing to work. I wanted to feed her like nature had intended. Stroking her overly long locks for a baby, Naomi sat back on the bed. Her warm hand felt my forehead. “You need sleep. You won’t make milk unless you sleep.” Kane crawled into the bed, now taking Evelyn.

“My mother is right, I’ll feed her, and you sleep. Maybe your milk will be here when you wake up.” I sighed sadly again, only nodding. I would feel like a complete failure as a mother if I couldn’t nurse Evelyn. It was what I had dreamed of since I had found out I was pregnant. Nursing was the way to achieve the close bond I desired with the baby.

“Listen here,” Naomi’s words became stern. “You are not a failure if you do not nurse your baby,” she scolded. “I couldn’t nurse Kane, and he turned out”—she eyed him up and down—“okay.” I laughed, covering my mouth. Kane gave a menacing glare as he bounced a screaming Evelyn.

Kane propped the bottle up for Evelyn to take. She guzzled the bottle down quickly, her screams silenced. She was hungry—too hungry. Biting my cheek, I nuzzled my head onto Kane’s lap, staying close to Evelyn and to Kane.

“Sleep, my love. You did so good.” Kane’s big hand pushed my sweaty hair away from my face until I finally fell asleep with the warmth of the tingles soothing me.

As I woke up, heavy rocks sat on my chest. I groaned, feeling painfully sore. My mother gently rubbed my shoulder, asking me to wake up. “I smell your milk has come in, darling,” her voice said sweetly. Evelyn was stirring, trying to reach for me. Smiling, I took her quickly, feeling the heaviness in my chest, wanting to explode.

“I told Kane to go to the office and that I’d watch you.”

“I don’t need a babysitter,” I grumbled as Evelyn latched on perfectly. I wanted to cry tears of joy seeing the long sucks and the little gulps that let me know she was drinking.

“See, I knew it would happen.” My mother pushed my hair away. I still sniffed, unable to control these weepy hormones.

“This is a lot,” I whispered, still feeding Evelyn.

“It is, for the first time anyway. At least they weren’t twins, huh?” My eyes widened, leaning my head back on the headboard.

“That would be so hard,” I whimpered.

“Hey, love, are you hungry?” Kane walked in, setting down a tray of food. I hummed, Kane now hovering over me. “You did it, love. I’m so proud of you.” He nuzzled my cheek, kissing my mark. “You know you don’t have to do it though, right?” I nodded. Still, being stubborn, I wanted to do it, even if wolves only nursed their babies for a few months.

I had all these goals and duties since becoming luna to help better the pack. Mother had so many tutors from the palace come in, teaching me the history of this world, bits and pieces of other kingdoms and territories. Everything was complicated. Ruling with just knowledge wasn’t enough. You had to have a kind heart, but at some point, you had to draw a line. Wolves to this day think I was too lenient on both Jasper and Sebastian. I didn’t regret my decision one bit. Deep within me, I felt that they should have been let go, given another chance. Now Darius, he was a different story. I felt nothing for him. He was beyond redemption the first day.

Of course, I was overwhelming myself. I begged for more information on how to learn to make the best decisions, but the things I wanted to know how to do didn’t come from a book. It came from within. On a smaller scale, as luna, I felt like I could maybe do it, but as a queen, could I ever?

Even raising my family seemed like a daunting task. To raise my children to not be selfish, humble, and caring, how was I to do it all?

“I need to talk to the both of you.” Mother got up from the bed to sit down in the rocking chair. Kane had a plate of fruit, feeding me as I fed our daughter. His gentle fingers traced my jaw, leading me to look at him.

“You know the vision I had about the upcoming war back when you first had your mating ceremony, correct?” Elijah, my father, walked in with a large turkey leg, taking large bites. Mother just shook her head, rubbing her temples.

“I thought—Owe thought”—Mother stared at Father, gripping his hand—“that the battle with Marcellus and his rogues was the war or battle I had envisioned, but this does not seem to be the case.”

“What do you mean?” Evelyn cried, releasing herself from my breast. Pulling her away and switching to the other breast, mother cleared her throat.

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