Page 98 of The Lord I Once Loved

My stomach did a flip.

Now it was just Cavendish and I, standing in the small hallway behind Christ Church. On the other side of the wall beside us, a few of our friends and family were gathering in the church… waiting for the wedding to begin.

Cav watched me, his eyes serious and probing.

“You’re really getting married, aren’t you?”

I grinned.

“Appears so.”

“I never expected this, Marsden.”

“In all honesty, neither did I.”

Cav looked away, his expression clouding over.

“You really love her? Amelia?”

At the sound of her name, I felt my heart constrict just a bit. I had a strong feeling of protection whenever I heard it… as if I wanted to keep her safe from the world. Forever.

“I do.”

He looked back at me, his eyes distant.

“I’m happy for you, Marsden, even though I can’t understand it.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean…” He trailed off, looking away again. “Love. I can't imagine feeling that way about someone.”

“Neither could I, friend. Not until Amelia.”

“Aren’t you going to miss it? The women, and the parties… and the misbehavior?”

I understood the sentiment of the question. Only a few months ago, I wouldn’t have dreamt of marriage because of the very same fear. I was addicted to a lifestyle of hedonism, alcohol, and recklessness… and I thought that was the only way to live.

But it wasn’t. Only Amelia could have shown me that.

So the answer was a resoundingno.

Before I could answer, a bell rang out from above. Arlington’s head suddenly burst forth from the archway ahead.

“It’s time. Come on, boys. Game on!”

He was grinning wildly, and I couldn’t help but grin back.

Here goes.

I walked into the church, Cavendish and Arlington by my side. The guests turned their heads to watch me, and I noticed their faces one by one…

Mrs. Allen and Louisa Allen…

Cassandra Radcliffe, accompanied a stern looking new governess (Lady Radcliffe, blissfully, appeared to not be in attendance)…

Lord Grainger, and next to him, Genevieve Fisher…

I finally found myself at the front of the church, standing beside the officiant.

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