Page 27 of Twisted Hearts

15Aaron

I hadto physically strip Megan, stand her in the shower, and bath her. She’d gone into some type of crazy-person, mute mode and was freaking me the fuck out. I didn’t know how to deal with crazy people. Had I known she was truly insane, I’d have left her alone.

“Megan!” I yelled as I shook her, attempting to snap her out of whatever was wrong with her. “Shit!” I didn’t know if I still wanted to kill her since she was obviously mentally ill. I didn’t believe she was acting either. The light in her eyes had dwindled down to barely a flicker. She didn’t look like the beautiful woman I knew. Her face was so devoid of emotion, it appeared as if some dark creature had sucked it out of her.

I put her in my bedroom. After placing her in bed, I locked her in and went down to warm her a can of soup. A short while later, I attempted to feed her, but she wouldn’t eat. She hadn’t eaten or drank anything since I’d yanked her out of her apartment. Why was she like this? What was wrong with her?

She didn’t acknowledge my presence either, not even when I’d threaten to kill her again. After forcing her to at least drink water, I made her sit on the toilet and pee before I tucked her into my bed and covered her. Other than sitting on the bed next to her and watching her like a hawk, I didn’t know what else to do.

She eventually fell asleep but tossed, turned, and yelled most of the night. She pleaded for someone to stop hurting her, and when she wasn’t pleading for herself, she pleaded for others. She’d always slept restlessly, even talked in her sleep occasionally, but it had never been this bad.

My threats I’d made on her life must have triggered something. The longer I was around her like this, the less I wanted to kill her. Now, all I wanted to do was figure out what was wrong with her.

The next morning, she rose up out of the bed, an empty vessel on autopilot. I sat at the foot of the bed and watched her shuffle to the bathroom.

She bumped into the dresser like she didn’t know it was there until she’d hit it. Her vacant eyes never focused on any specific thing. Her mind had completely traveled to another place, and I didn’t know shit about how to get her back in the right frame.

* * *

A few flickersof life tried to ease back into Megan over the next few days. Although her expression remained empty, she’d at least swallowed her food and drank water when I’d given it to her.

Afraid to leave her alone, I’d called off from work and extended my leave. Talking to Megan didn’t work because her mind had vacated the premises, and only a shell of her remained. With my threat of killing her hanging over her head, she didn’t even try to escape. Unless I pulled her up, she remained in bed, crying and staring at the walls with the covers up to her chin.

When I could no longer take the silence of the state she was in, I walked her down to the kitchen and sat her across the table from me.

“Megan, I’m not going to kill you. I don’t think I’d ever intended to. I need you to tell me how to help you. What’s wrong? Are you like this because I threatened to kill you?”

Nothing.

“Does it have something to do with your childhood in Texas?”

Nothing.

I knew from studying her past that Megan’s foster father and his nephew, her foster brother, had molested her, but I didn’t want to remind her of it since it was likely what had caused her to be this way. Maybe the fact that she’d brutally stabbed them was haunting her. Was I going to have to call Dr. Henderson? The doctor was our local fix-it man. He wasn’t a head doctor, but maybe he could give me some advice on how to help Megan.

For what seemed like hours, I sat across from her trying to figure out what could have plunged her into this state. A random, yet rational thought struck me. She hadn’t become this way until after I’d told her that I’d killed her friends.

I’d threatened to kill her, and she’d said nothing. I’d threatened to torture her, and she’d said nothing. But, the moment I’d told her that I’d killed her friends, she cried. She’d cried hard and hysterically. This had to be her way of handling the guilt she felt about her friends.

“Is this about your friends, Beverly and Laura?”

She glanced at me then with more life in her eyes than I’d seen since she’d pissed in my truck.

“I didn’t kill your friends, Megan. I only told you that to make you feel as bad as I did. I might be an asshole, but I’m not a completely homicidal maniac. If I’d known that something I could say could make you snap, I’d have kept my mouth shut.”

A few more hints of life sparked into her teary eyes, enough to put a tint of color back in her ashen cheeks. After walking around the table to her, I made her stand before I took her seat and sat her across my lap. I snuggled her tight against my chest before wrapping her in my arms. She was as crazy as fuck, but I loved her.

Words I’d never intended to say to her bubbled to the surface of my mind and spilled over my vocal cords. The truest words I’d ever spoken to anyone started to sneak past my lips and brushed over her earlobe.

“I love you, Megan. That’s why I couldn’t kill you. That’s why I can’t kill you. That’s why I was so hurt when I found out you had played my entire MC and me. And if that wasn’t enough, you fucked my father, and I still don’t hate you enough to hurt you. I still fucking love you.”

At those words, her arms folded tighter around my neck as her body shook against mine. Her tears dripped down my neck as she repeatedly sobbed. “I’m sorry, Aaron. I never meant to hurt you.”

Maybe Megan was playing me again. Maybe she was the ultimate manipulator that had enough practice to get what she wanted from anyone. Maybe she’d turned me into a big fucking fool-hearted idiot. I didn’t know what to believe, what to think, or what to trust about Megan.

All I knew was that I loved the damn woman, and I couldn’t overcome it. I couldn’t turn the shit off. I couldn’t beat it. She had a fucking hold on me that I couldn’t fight. My heart was so twisted over her that I’m sure it was sitting sideways in my chest.

Megan slept snuggled against me that night. I held her while she fought whatever demons were haunting her. As impossible as it was to believe, I didn’t bother her for sex. I wanted her to get better before I fucked the shit out of her again.

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