Page 17 of No One Wants That (Blitzen Bay)

BUTCH

“This town pisses me off already.”

As we summit the hill that leads down into Blitzen Bay, the view is so unbelievably beautiful that I almost do a U-turn and head back to L.A.

“Aww, buddy,” Millie says, using the sugary tone she only uses when she’s talking to Mo. “Was the town mean to you? Mommy will take care of it for you.”

“Refer to yourself as my mommy again and I’m going to need someone to take care of something south of my belt.”

I lean toward the door again to try to avoid Mason’s hand. No such luck. He lands this one hard on my jaw.

“Could you maybe wait until I park to knock the crap out of me?” I say, shoving his arm away.

“Quit whining,” he says. “You’ve driven successfully through heavy mortar fire many times. You’re fine.”

Millie pokes her head into the front seat again. She snakes her arm through Mason’s and lays her chin on his shoulder.

“I don’t know,” she says, looking out the front windshield. “Blitzen looks kind of perfect to me.”

“That’s the point,” I say, letting out a frustrated grunt. “It’s all romantic looking. Look at that lake. I mean, seriously, why does the water need to be that color? It’s obnoxious.”

I point at the aggressively blue lake to our left. It’s surrounded by thickets of deep green pines. There are docks jutting out into the water around the lake and I can just see the roofs of houses peeking out through the dense tree line. If I weren’t in such a foul mood, this place would be my version of heaven.

“I read that there’s calcium particles in the lake that reflect the blue color to the surface,” Alex says. “Plus the reflection from the sky. That’s why it’s that turquoise color.”

“It was a rhetorical question, professor,” I say, looking back at him. “Keep your nerd facts to yourself.”

“I thought it was interesting,” Raine says, snuggling closer to him. “I like your nerd facts.”

“I know they turn you on, baby. That’s why I say them.”

“The only good thing about arriving in this stupid town,” I hiss, “is that I can get away from happy-couple hell.”

Millie gasps as we round the corner and get a clearer view. There are rows of perfectly manicured chalets lining the street that goes through the center of town. It’s backed up against the deep green mountains with just a touch of snow at their peaks.

“Wow,” she says, squeezing Mason’s arm tighter. “This might be the most romantic place I’ve ever seen. Sorry, Butch.”

Mason tilts her chin up and kisses her. “It is, baby. And I’m not sorry, Butch. Not even a little bit.”

I pull into a parking space right in front of Holly House, the inn where we’re staying. I leap out of the car and run up the stairs. The guy at the front desk jumps as I charge through the door.

“Sorry, man,” I say, slowing my pace. “I just endured a road trip with two stupidly happy couples. I need to get the hell away from them for a while. Checking in. Butch Harrison.”

“Understood,” he says, laughing. “I’m Hank. You’re part of Nash’s group coming in from San Diego, right? Three rooms?”

“Yeah, the others are coming,” I say, nodding back as I hear the door open behind me.

“Butch,” Raine says. “What is wrong with you? Could you not wait for the rest of us?”

I hear two sets of flip flops rapidly closing in on me. Raine and Millie each grab one of my arms.

“Damn,” Hank says. “Looks like you’re set. Or are you telling me neither one of them is yours?”

“Blissfully, neither one is mine,” I say, circling my arms around their shoulders and squeezing their heads to my chest. “Meet Raine and Millie—my two non-blood-related, pain-in-the-ass little sisters. And the two behind them are Alex and Mason. They have the other two rooms.”

“Nice to meet you all. I’m Hank,” he says, smiling. “Nash and Noelle are so excited to have you in town for the week.”

“Is there enough to do in this town for the entire week?” I ask.

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