Page 25 of The Boy I Once Loved

Chapter Five

I stir and yawn as I wake. I slept through with no more nightmares and I know it is because he is here. The last two nights I have slept better. He makes me feel safe. I watch his chest rise and fall as I lie with my cheek against where his heart beats. I can’t help but imagine what it would feel like to wake up like this most mornings, but it’s just a dream. Dylan is my friend, and he was there for me last night as my friend and nothing more. He will never see me as anything more than the girl he grew up with, and I can’t ever risk him knowing how I feel as it could destroy our friendship.

“You okay?” He asks me, his voice is husky from just waking up. I nod, not wanting to speak and ruin this moment of pretending. His hand strokes my head gently. “You sleep okay?”

“Yeah.” His other hand on my back trails up and down, creating goosebumps along my skin.

“The nightmare. Was it about ...?”

I nod my head again against his chest. I can’t raise my head and look at him and let him see all the emotions I am feeling being here with him, like this.

“You get them a lot?”

“Every night. More than once.”

He sighs deeply. “Jeez, El. You slept okay though, with me here?”

“I feel safe when I’m with you. I can sleep.”

“Then I’ll sleep with you every night.”

I chuckle and I finally lift my head and look at him. His hair is all ruffled, and he looks rested and too fucking good. “I don’t think my mum would agree with that plan.”

He grins. “What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her. I’ll sneak in through your bedroom window.”

“You’d do that? For me?”

He sits up and pulls me up with him, keeping his arm around my waist. “You even have to ask? I told you. I won’t let you down ever again.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep Dylan,” I say, chewing on my lip.

He wraps his little finger around mine. “I pinkie swear I will always be here for you.”

I smile as I look at our two fingers intertwined. “Until a girl comes along and steals your heart and then I’ll be forgotten about.”

He grins as he takes our linked pinkies and raises them to his lips, and he kisses them. “No girl will steal my heart if it’s not there to steal.”

I frown. Is he saying he doesn’t have a heart? “One day Dylan James, you will fall in love and I will be there to remind you of all the times you said it would never happen.”

He smiles as if enjoying a secret joke. “Oh, you’ll be there all right.” He clears his throat. “We need to shower. Separately, of course,” he adds, smirking.

"Too right. I'm not sharing hot water with you, James."

He gestures to the en-suite door. “You going to need help?”

Chewing on my lip, I nod. "If you could just help me in, I should be fine."

He clears his throat and he nods, sliding out of bed. He turns and holds out his hands. “Come on up.”

He lifts me and he carries me into his en-suite and sits me down on the toilet. He walks over to the shower and turns it on, and I try to steady my breath. I could have asked his mum to help, but deep down I know I wanted the excuse to be here, close to him, to have him touch me. He grabs his t-shirt and pulls it over my head, leaving me sat there in my bra and knickers. He offers me a towel.

“Wrap this around you and then we can get you naked.” He waggles his eyebrows and smirks.

I roll my eyes at him as I wrap the towel around my chest. I then pull my arm out of one side of my bra and then the other and somehow lift it over my head whilst keeping the towel around me.

"Okay, up you get." He pulls me up and I lean my hands on his shoulders as his hands snake under the bottom of the towel and finds the elastic of my panties. He pulls them down my thighs until they fall down to my ankles, I step out of them and kick them to the side. Dylan takes my boot off and then holding my arms at my elbows, he helps me over to the shower and slides the glass door open. He leans over me and turns the shower dial.

"I'll err, be out there. Just shout if you need me."

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